Page 24 of 26 FirstFirst ... 142223242526 LastLast
Results 921 to 960 of 1038

Thread: Lisa the Legend: Chapter 82 - Last Night on Earth now up! (24th June 2013)

  1. #921
    Veteran Trainer
    Veteran Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    The Fanfiction Forum
    Posts
    19,535

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Wait. So, was Lance completely BSing Jim? Ooh… suddenly this casts a little doubt on the shining figure that is the Guard’s leader. How much can he really be trusted? Or is all of this a red herring? Did he simply make a mistake in deciding what information to believe, and was he merely trying to avoid riling up Jim further? Very, very interesting.

    I have to say, I’m amazed that the beginning of this chapter was so intense. You did a great job of injecting intense emotion into an otherwise peaceful scene. Likewise, the “present” in this chapter was also captivating; given that the conversation degraded into a shouting match, though, it was probably a little easier to pull off that one.

    As usual, I only have minor nitpicks to make about this chapter. Watch your grammar; there were one or two instances where you needlessly ended your sentences with prepositions. You might want to work just a little on eliminating redundant words during the editing process, too. This is the one flaw I do notice consistently in your writing. It’s very, very minor, but when the same word pops up multiple times over the span of one, two or three paragraphs (such as “enormous” during Jim’s entrance or “cool” as the argument reached its boiling point), it can catch the eye of your readers and cast aside the exceptional mood you’ve set.

    That’s sort of a compliment in a criticism, as you continue to be one of the most skilled writers at mood setting that I’ve ever seen. It’s truly a gift to be able to take a squabble between father and son and make it feel like a life-or-death scenario. The characterization you use is also powerful, from major players (like Lance) to those who serve in the most minor roles (coffee girl). I liked how you interjected bits and pieces of the setting and character images into the text, too. The clash of Lance’s shirt with those of his teenage peers was good, as was the vision his shiny desk. Very good work! As usual, it’s hard to find anything beyond minuscule tweaks to suggest for your writing.
    IT HAS RETURNED.
    THE TPM MAIN SITE.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gavin Luper View Post
    Holy crap ... I'VE become a grammar nazi, too.

  2. #922
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Brian: Cheers for the prompt reply, as always!

    Indeed, what was Lance up to? I shall say nothing at all.

    I actually felt the beginning of the chapter was the weakest part of it. I really had to write my way in until I felt comfortable, but that whole flashback still felt a little awkward and shoddy ... I was happy enough with it, however.

    I hadn't even noticed about the redundant words, but now that you point it out, it is glaringly obvious. Especially for the "cool". That's what I get for not proofreading my chapters aloud ... I really ought to in future. That, and maybe I should take more time in writing them. They tend to pour out in torrents from my brain and I don't edit them as much as I probably should. Thanks for the nitpick, anyway: it'll definitely help me improve my writing.

    Hoorah. You noticed the teenage Lance's different clothing. It was probably as subtle as a kick in the teeth, but I liked making that distinction. It's significant on a number of levels. Actually, this whole chapter was kind of hugely important, even though we didn't get to see any of Lisa or Gavin. What we do learn is that Lance isn't going to rescue Lisa, which I personally find pretty unsettling.

    Also - what were those sentences you mentioned that ended with prepositions? I can't find them in a great hurry and I sense you might be faster at it than me.

    Anyhoo - cheers for the critique, dude!

    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  3. #923
    Veteran Trainer
    Veteran Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    The Fanfiction Forum
    Posts
    19,535

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Hey, no problem, man. It's what I do! ^_^ I look forward to seeing how this particular angle develops. It's the first shadow we've seen from the otherwise infallible Lance. The question is, was it a mistake or was it sabotage?

    As for the sentences that ended in prepositions, since you're asking...


    The older man halted abruptly.

    This does not end in a preposition, but since I noticed it while looking for them, "abruptly halted" would be a tad more correct. Sometimes it's reasonable to bend that rule for effect - you've done it elsewhere, and I can see why in many of those occasions - but I'm not sure it's a helpful technique here.


    He shook himself sternly and returned to the thick wad of printed documents he was meant to be reading through.

    "through which he was meant to be reading" is a legitimate fix, but I'd almost prefer just scratching the "through."


    He also sported a very raw graze on his left cheek, which he had apparently refused any treatment for.

    "for which he had apparently refused any treatment."


    Sarah twirled a strand of her wavy brown hair nervously.

    Adverb use again. "nervously twirled" doesn't lose any of the effect, methinks.


    ...Yeah, so I ended up including a bit more in that than just the "prepositions ending sentences" stuff. Sorry. However, I figured that, knowing you, you'd probably want to see those sentences too.
    IT HAS RETURNED.
    THE TPM MAIN SITE.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gavin Luper View Post
    Holy crap ... I'VE become a grammar nazi, too.

  4. #924
    Elite Trainer
    Elite Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    2,623

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    I always had a bad feeling about Lance. The guy knew too much; he was the only source of "truth". Not to mention that he'd have way too much power if the Guard succeeded in obtaining all the keys before the Union did. Still, I'm dubious that he's evil altogether; I think he might be the ruthless type who does what he sees is best for the greater good, without caring too much about who gets hurt in the process. It seems that Lance's relationship with his dad will be significant in his relationship with Darius, especially with the "World's Best Dad" cup connection. Obviously his dad still exerts a lot of influence -- given their relationship back in 1977, I have to wonder why. Is he directly exerting the pressure, or does Lance feel obliged live up to his standards? Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if we've met Lance's dad before...

    Yeah, great characterisation, as Brian said. The caffeine addiction amuses me. The argument with Jim Donovan flowed well as well. I also like the detail at the beginning about the men with briefcases darting as though they are afraid of the sun. It'll be interesting how Lance explains all of this to Darius; the whole thing will have a different dynamic, because Darius isn't likely to bow to his father's superiority. (Even if we don't get to see the conversation in the actual fic.)

    Liked it, keep writing, etc. etc.
    mistysakura
    2007 Golden Pens: Co-winner of Best Poem (Rain Eternal) and Best Reviewer
    2007 Silver Pencils: Winner of Best Poem (Death Sonnet -- Untitled)
    2004 Silver Pencils: Winner of Nicest Fanficcer & Least Likely Couple (with PancaKe)
    Former 3-time winner of Most Dedicated Reader at the Fanfiction Forums
    Also Keeper of the 'A'ctivator Unown

    Brimstone Diamonds. The Artist. Tightrope. Solitude. Autopsy.
    Glitter (one-shot).
    Listen to Rain Eternal -- a song.

    Random thought: 2+2=5.

  5. #925
    Veteran Trainer
    Veteran Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    The Fanfiction Forum
    Posts
    19,535

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    See, I'm not so sure Lance is even the ruthless type (much less downright evil)... I'm kind of thinking this may be a red herring. Of course, that could very well just be me hoping Lance is a pure-of-heart guy. Judging by the way that chapter went, a lot probably hinges on his father's identity. I'm trying to remember his age... as well as that of our good buddy Joseph Sterling. That's probably a long shot, though.
    IT HAS RETURNED.
    THE TPM MAIN SITE.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gavin Luper View Post
    Holy crap ... I'VE become a grammar nazi, too.

  6. #926
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Brian1: Thanks for the grammatical corrections. I guess those sentences are just indicative of some stylistic traits I've picked up and grown to like over the years. But I'll keep in mind that what I find pleasing to read might come across as slightly jarring to an audience. It's definitely something I'll need to be aware of if I want to look at publishing in the future.

    Ada: I think I remember you voicing some similar predictions and tentative suspicions about the Guard - and Lance - as far back as when I first posted Chapter 58 (almost two years ago now, egad). I like your thought processes, but I prefer not to comment to my readers about their predictions; I'd hate to tacitly shoot an idea down in flames, or confirm it. Speculation and mystery are fun.

    Lance's relationship with Darius, however ... well, I'm glad my prose made it clear that it will be, in some way, significant to ... something. Bwahaha.

    About Lance's Dad ... time shall tell.

    And yes, Lance's phone conversation with Darius would definitely be an interesting one to read, though you're right to question whether or not I'll include it in a future chapter.

    I'm glad you guys both liked the characterisation. I always hope I'm improving in that area.

    Brian2: "No, Lance. I - am - your father." Hee. If I had published my character profiles on here, you might have the answer to your question. About Lance's father that is, not the prospect of a red herring.

    Would I deliberately try to confuse my readers?

    You bet.

    Thanks to both of you for your replies, I'm glad you're still finding the fic engaging. Chapter 65 - here we come!

    Cheers!
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  7. #927
    The slaughter never ends. Junior Trainer
    Junior Trainer

    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    344

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Holy crap... o_o The argument between Lance and Donovan was amazing, very intense. I doubt I'll be forgetting that scene anytime soon.

    And frell, are you ever good with characters. o_o I'm sure I've said something along those lines before, but it bears repeating, damn it! X3 Anyway, that skill definitely worked to great effect in that chapter, shining through the aforementioned scene that took place in '03, as well as through the scene with Lance and his father. ^^

    Highlights and et cetera:

    “There are things more important than power,” grizzled the older man, clutching his brown leather briefcase tighter to his body as he passed a homeless man slumped on the pavement outside a hostel. “And why did you go over the word limit? You lose marks for that, you know.”
    Lol, brevity's not one of my strong suits, either. X3;

    “What is it now, Sarah?” he thudded, several hours past being polite.
    Nice choice of words. ^^

    “You’re losing focus, Jim,” said Lance in the most level voice he could manage. “The Union haven’t won anything. There are still five keys to be found. We still have our other two guardians, Marina and Darius, safe at the Stone’s station. Losing Lisa is damaging to us, yes, and beneficial to our enemy, but that does NOT mean our operations fall apart. The Legend of Ecruteak still stands, and Lisa is not the cornerstone of that Legend, she is only a part of it!”

    But Donovan was now beyond cool reason or dialogue – he was looking at Lance as though he had just committed murder.

    “I can’t believe I’m hearin’ yer say these things, Lance. ‘She’s just a part of it’, is she?” he demanded hotly. “S’that whatya told ‘er parents?”

    “What was said between Ryan, Maria and I is between us!” snarled Lance, quite forgetting to keep his cool; the wound of that morning’s explosive argument was still very raw.

    “Ya dog,” spat Donovan, getting to his feet. “Ya won’t even rescue the child of one of yer best mates –”

    Lance was on his feet before he knew it; thoughts of having a cool discussion were long forgotten. “YOU FUCKING HYPOCRITE! Five minutes ago, I was the bad guy for apparently sending you into an ambush, and now you’re losing your head at me for trying to prevent the same thing from happening again!”

    “That’s –” Donovan spluttered angrily. “That’s – not the same thing –”

    “My position is final, Jim. You don’t know how hard it was to decide –”

    “Oh, poor you, having to sit in yer big office with yer big window and decide the fate of another human!” Donovan raged. He pointed his finger at Lance’s face once again, his air both threatening and disillusioned. “I – cannot – believe ya.”
    Again, their argument was very well done--I could have quoted the whole damned thing here, really, but instead opted to just post my absolute favorite part of it. It's still a pretty big quote, but eh... like I said, brevity's not one of my strong suits. X3;

    Congrats on yet another great chapter, and congrats on your most recently-won Silver Pencil awards! ^^

  8. #928
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    You know, rereading this has become a fantastic piece of procrastination.
    I hope you are happy, Gavin.
    I fail uni, and its all your fault





    (I'm up to chapter 15 - and I'd forgotten how wonderful your writing style is!)



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  9. #929
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Whoops, somehow I kept putting off replying. Go figure.

    Sike: Cheers for the review again! Cool that you liked the argument - it's always hard to keep the balance between realistic dialogue and overblown dramatics, so I hope I achieved that. And yay, I'm glad the flashback worked well to emphasise the characterisation. Thanks for your comments there: as I've said a lot of times before, characters have always seemed like a slightly weaker area for me, so I'm always trying to be less crap in that area.

    Thanks for your congrats, and for your continued readership. I always like the quote-filled replies I get from you. Seeya next chapter!

    Tara: Hullo... come crawling back to LTL, eh? Haha. I was gonna say "well, yes, I am happy, thanks for that" but then I realised you were being sarcastic. Wench!

    Hope you didn't fail uni. I'm glad I could offer up some decent procrastination fodder, I know how competitive the market is for that. Thanks for the comments.

    Whee!

    Next chapter: I've been working a fair bit on Chapter 65, but it hasn't been ringing true for me yet. I have one final exam on Tuesday and then Uni is over for about four months, so hopefully - HOPEFULLY - I can churn out some chapters. I'm really itching to get going with them. Where the story goes next really excites me, partly because I like the upcoming plot and story arcs, and partly because they've been in my head for such a long time that I'll be ecstatic to see them really spring to life on the page.

    Thanks for your eternal patience, everyone.

    Cheers!

    - Gavin.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  10. #930
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Chapter 64 up!

    Hi everyone.

    I'm still stuck on Chapter 65: the stuff that happens in it ought to make it awesome, and the stuff I've written so far simply isn't awesome, so I've got to keep working on it and make it what I want it to be.

    I'm posting because it's been suggested to me that I ought to write a synopsis of the first 64 chapters of Lisa the Legend. It's spanned over seven years now and often there are months between chapters, so it's occurred to me that a lot of readers have probably forgotten a lot of the events that occurred in earlier chapters. As these events are going to be important in the upcoming chapters, I'm thinking that a summary of "the story so far" might indeed be a really worthwhile thing for me to do, especially as I'm stuck on the next chapter anyway.

    Plus, I've been told that it would make new readers of the fic feel less daunted if they had a summary to read.

    So, what do you guys think? Would you read the synopsis if I posted it here? Would it be a helpful tool for you? And, for all those potential/closet readers, would you be more inclined to read if you knew what on earth the story was about?

    Let me know your opinions - I'll try to get working away at it!

    Cheers!

    - Gavin.
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 10th March 2009 at 08:31 AM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  11. #931
    Beginning Trainer
    Beginning Trainer
    Cadmus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    99

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - The Story So Far?

    I started reading this fic a while back, and I think I went through quite a lot of chapters. And though I love to know every detail of the story when I read one, I'd really love to read a summary of everything so far so that I can participate in the up-to-date conversations about the story arcs and all that. So yeah, it would be quite a good addition to do a "What happened so far..."

    And of course, if a particular chapter or chapters were important to the story (as I'm sure there have been lol), the summary would make it easier for us new readers to read them directly and dive into the epic that is "Lisa the Legend".

    Recaps are awesome.

  12. #932
    Elite Trainer
    Elite Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    2,623

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - The Story So Far?

    Please don't procrastinate by writing synopses. But really, a summary would be great. Seeing as fanficcers typically read many, many fics simultaneously, it's hard to keep track of stuff, especially the little things that could lead to big plot twists! I agree that it would help new readers, not just so it's less daunting, but also so they can see if the plot absorbs them.
    mistysakura
    2007 Golden Pens: Co-winner of Best Poem (Rain Eternal) and Best Reviewer
    2007 Silver Pencils: Winner of Best Poem (Death Sonnet -- Untitled)
    2004 Silver Pencils: Winner of Nicest Fanficcer & Least Likely Couple (with PancaKe)
    Former 3-time winner of Most Dedicated Reader at the Fanfiction Forums
    Also Keeper of the 'A'ctivator Unown

    Brimstone Diamonds. The Artist. Tightrope. Solitude. Autopsy.
    Glitter (one-shot).
    Listen to Rain Eternal -- a song.

    Random thought: 2+2=5.

  13. #933
    Veteran Trainer
    Veteran Trainer

    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Posts
    10,951

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - The Story So Far?

    Oh god, yes. I've been reading this fic since it first started and I can't remember half of what occurred
    T_M_L

    My ASB Team:
    Nightshade, Orion, Drake, Apollo, Shino, Ares, Arya, Isis, Ace, Arbiter, Nero, Haplo, Coren, and Marit

  14. #934
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - "The Story So Far" coming soon!

    Thanks Cadmus, Ada and Becca for your comments.

    Progress update: I've just finished synopsising all of Book I (Chapters 1 - 20) and I'm really enjoying looking back at all these early chapters, it takes me right back to the time when I wrote them. The synopsis so far is ten pages - I'm handwriting it, which is the way I started writing the fic itself, too - but I expect it will have to be condensed down to express only the most crucial details, otherwise the synopsis will end up being so long that it'll need its own synopsis.

    I'm also thinking I might produce a little "Companion Guide" to the fic, just something where I can give a few character bios on the main and secondary characters that have appeared so far and things like that. I'd probably just tack this on in the same post as the overall synopsis once it's done.

    Cheers for your patience, everyone!
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  15. #935
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Synopsis!

    Okay, it's time to get this ball rolling!

    I'm going to start posting the synopses of the chapters and books of this fic that have been written so far - first up, the entirety of Book One.

    Thanks for your endless patience, guys. Although it doesn't look it, I've actually been really busy with LTL (more so now that exams have just finished) - once I post these synopses up, you'll be delighted to more than just one chapter, and a couple of surprises!

    Hope you all find this recap a useful reference; and, to new readers, I hope this helps introduce you to the world of Lisa the Legend in a less daunting way than trying to approach all 64 chapters at once.

    I'd really love some feedback on this synopsis: is it too long, or is there just enough detail to sustain it? Hoping for some guidance on this if possible.

    Cheers guys - and watch this space! More is on the way!!!

    +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+

    Lisa the Legend – Synopsis.


    Book One: Legendaries.


    Chapter 1 - Adventure in the Burned Tower.

    The story opens on a balmy October morning in Ecruteak City. Fourteen-year-old Lisa Walters has just finished her compulsory schooling, but she is not enjoying her summer break as much as she had hoped: her school friends, Tuscany and Charmaine, have left town for the holidays and her parents, experienced palaeontologists, have relocated to Kanto for a dig, leaving her to take care of her precocious younger siblings. The only good thing that has happened for Lisa lately is that her parents bought her her very first pokémon – but what’s the use in having an Aipom when the local Gym leader uses only ghost-type pokémon?

    Frustrated that her parents have banned her from starting a pokémon journey of her own, Lisa decides to spend a day training at the Burned Tower, especially as there have been recent news reports of legendary pokémon sightings there. Leaving her siblings in the care of her grandmother, Lisa sets off for the Burned Tower – never expecting that what she sees there will change her life forever.


    Chapter 2 - Lisa's Quest Begins.


    After a victory against a fellow pokémon trainer, Lisa ventures too far into the depths of the Burned Tower and falls through to the hidden basement below, right into the middle of what appears to be a clandestine meeting between none other than Suicune, Raikou and Entei – the three legendary dogs themselves!

    Catching hold of Suicune, Lisa and Aipom ride on his back as he pelts out of Ecruteak City, eventually throwing them off unceremoniously into a lake. After Suicune is attacked by a territorial Wooper, Lisa attempts to capture Suicune in a pokéball, which appears only to enrage him. He launches an aggressive attack on Lisa and Wooper before fleeing the scene.

    Having accidentally captured Wooper in the process, Lisa is left in the wilderness alone, amazed at what she has just witnessed. She vows to find out more about the mystery of Suicune.

    En route to the nearest town (Goldenrod City), Lisa battles a trainer named Anna, whose denial of the existence of legendary pokémon only fuels Lisa’s resolve.


    Chapter 3 - The Contest.

    Still trying to find her way to Goldenrod City, Lisa encounters Hiro and Kristal, two trainers from New Bark Town. The three become travelling partners for the day, taking part in the local Bug Catching Contest.

    While competing, Lisa receives a phone call from her elder brother Tom, who demands to know where she has gone. After a heated discussion, he agrees to allow Lisa to travel around the nearby regions, on the condition that she returns to Ecruteak before their parents do.

    The Bug Catching Contest finishes, with Hiro winning and Kris taking out third place; Lisa, who only catches a Caterpie, fails to rate a mention.


    Chapter 4 - Friends and Rivals.

    Lisa, Hiro and Kris continue to travel together, arriving in Goldenrod City to heal their pokémon. Lisa meets Tyler, Hiro’s obnoxious rival trainer, and the two engage in a heated match outside the pokémon centre.

    After the battle, the travellers part ways: Hiro and Kris continue their quest for more gym badges, while Lisa sets off for the Radio Tower, which houses an extensive library that she knows holds information on the legendary pokémon – including Suicune.


    Chapter 5 - Inside the Radio Tower.

    Lisa visits Goldenrod City’s imposing Radio Tower. After being accosted by a suspicious man in black at the entrance, she meets a helpful library employee around her own age, named Gavin Luper, who shares her belief and interest in the legendary pokémon.

    As Gavin takes Lisa to the tower’s Video Vault to find a Suicune documentary called “Sacred Suicune”, the two begin to form a friendship, and agree to meet for a friendly battle that evening.

    Once they reach the vault however, those plans fall by the wayside. The two are stunned by the appearance of an oversized black beast, which prepares to attack them both with a deadly-looking green orb of light …


    Chapter 6 - Recovery.

    Just as the Black Beast’s attack is fired, Gavin screams out with pain, apparently suffering a migraine, before shooting out a beam of psychic energy at the beast. The ensuing collision of energy tears the Radio Tower apart; as a bookshelf falls to crush her, Lisa passes out in shock.

    Lisa wakes up on Route 34; she and Gavin were apparently teleported to safety. Once they are taken to hospital to convalesce, Lisa broaches the subject of the psychic beam that Gavin used to save them. To her surprise, he becomes aggressive and flatly refuses to acknowledge the event even took place.

    Finding out that Lisa is on a pokémon journey, Gavin’s Uncle Eusine, whilst visiting Gavin, asks her to deliver some pokémon to his friend Jack Criddle on Cianwood Island.

    Eager for an adventure, Lisa obliges.


    Chapter 7 - Journey for Cianwood.

    Lisa and Gavin bond while returning to Route 34 to pick up Gavin’s Natu from the local police. Lisa learns more about the mysterious Black Beast while talking to the on-duty officer.

    After defeating Lock, a bug pokémon trainer, in battle, Lisa is elated when her Wooper evolves into Quagsire. After the fight, Lisa and Gavin decide to part ways – he will return home to Goldenrod, whilst she will be heading for Cianwood Island – however, as he watches Lisa leave, Gavin begins to question the decision to part with his newfound friend.


    Chapter 8 - Suicune's Return.


    Now with a team of six pokémon – Aipom, Quagsire, Butterfree and Girafarig, plus Eusine’s Mankey and Granbull – Lisa reaches the coast. As Quagsire dives into the shallows, Lisa sees, to her amazement, Suicune standing furiously before them. Suicune and Quagsire engage in a fierce battle, while Suicune becomes more and more incensed at both Quagsire and Lisa.

    When Suicune turns on Lisa, she runs, abandoning her pokémon for her own safety. Just when it appears that Suicune is about to attack her fatally, Lisa is teleported to safety by a Natu latching onto her shoulder: it turns out Gavin has changed his mind and decided to come with her to Cianwood, saving her at the crucial moment.

    Realising with horror that she has left Quagsire alone on the beach, Lisa runs back, only to see Quagsire reject her and swim out into the Cianwood Sea without her.


    Chapter 9 - Battle on the Coral Reef.

    Lisa surfs into the sea on Gavin’s Staryu in search of her estranged Quagsire. Finding a coral reef, she meets Irene, a local trainer who claims she has just captured Quagsire for herself. The two begin to battle for ownership of Quagsire.


    Chapter 10 - Fighting the Ocean.

    During the match, Quagsire becomes overwhelmed with compassion for Lisa’s nearly-drowned Aipom and returns to Lisa. Irene reveals herself to be a Gym Leader for the Whirlpool Cup. Lisa defeats her in a fierce match and wins the Coral Reef Badge.

    Regrouping, Lisa and Gavin surf to Cianwood Island. After struggling with a dangerous whirlpool, in which Lisa enlists the help of her newly-caught Dratini and Gavin captures a particularly violent green Lanturn, the friends find themselves beaches on the shore of Cianwood Island.


    Chapter 11 - The Ungrateful Sailor.

    Shortly after, Lisa delivers Eusine’s two pokémon to a sailor named Jack Criddle. Lisa and Jack battle on his boat as it sails back to Red Rock Island. Impressed by Lisa’s skill and doggedness, Jack gives her a pokéball, but before Lisa can open it, the boat is sucked into an even larger whirlpool than before …


    Chapter 12 - Psychics.

    Lisa, Gavin and Jack attempt to use their pokémon to fight the whirlpool – to no avail. As the boat is sucked deeper into the water, Gavin loses his balance and is roughly slammed into a metal railing, collapsing before abruptly screaming with pain. His psychic powers activated, he telekinetically returns the boat to safety, much to Lisa and Jack’s bewilderment.

    Later that evening, Gavin acknowledges his psychic powers to Lisa and explains the curse that he believes has been placed on his family.

    Arriving on Red Rock Island, Lisa decides to compete in the Whirlpool Cup.


    Chapter 13 - The Colosseum.

    Lisa and Gavin experience Red Rock Island before going to the Colosseum for the Whirlpool Cup tournament’s opening round. Lisa’s badge automatically qualifies her for the second round; Gavin, meanwhile, fights and wins his first battle.


    Chapter 14 - The Water Washout.

    Back on Shellder Beach, Irene is awoken at night by a man demanding to know in which direction Lisa Walters is headed. Irene reveals that Lisa intended to participate in the Whirlpool Cup.

    The next day on Red Rock Island, Lisa finds that her first opponent is none other than Anna, the trainer she met on the first day of her journey who sneered at her tale of legendary pokémon.

    During Lisa and Anna’s match, a collision of Ice Beams causes Lisa’s Dratini and Anna’s Psyduck to be frozen underwater, both unable to breathe.


    Chapter 15 - Watered-Down Revenge.

    The Colosseum is overrun by trainers trying to unlock Dratini and Psyduck from their airless prison, but when Gavin’s Lanturn electrocutes him, his powers are activated once more, shredding the ice field but rescuing the trapped pokémon. Exhausted by the effort, Gavin falls down a crevice in the ice, unconscious.

    While Gavin convalesces in hospital, Lisa has a rematch with Anna and wins, taking her through to the competition’s Semi Final.

    Meanwhile, Gavin is consulted by a psychic pokémon expert, who turns out to be a representative from Ecruteak Gym – Tom Walters, Lisa’s elder brother. Gavin discusses his powers in depth for the first time.


    Chapter 16 - Whirlpool Champion - Part I.

    Gavin and Lisa continue to train and fight their way through the tournament, eventually reaching the unusual three-way Grand Final match.

    Before the match, Lisa realises that her passion is not just pokémon training, but researching the legendary pokémon. She decides to become more focused on her goal after the Whirlpool Cup is over.


    Chapter 17 - Whirlpool Champion - Part II.

    After an epic match, Lisa and Gavin are crushed by a skilled water pokémon trainer named Marina. At the after party, Lisa and Marina become friendly, exchanging contact information and promising to catch up again soon.


    Chapter 18 - Legendaries.

    Gavin spends a day training on Silver Rock Island, where he encounters (and appears to capture) a sleeping baby Lugia; it is later revealed, however, to be a crafty Ditto.

    Lisa is contacted by Professor Westwood, a pokédex contributor, who asks her to help write the entry for the Black Beast, as she is one of a small number of people who have ever sighted it. While compiling the entry, Lisa discovers more about the history of the Black Beast, which she names “Lunanine”.

    By way of thanks, Professor Westwood gives Lisa a pair of crystal bells. He invites her and Gavin to join him on an expedition to Silver Rock Island to look for Lugia, but they decide instead to head back to mainland Johto.


    Chapter 19 - Sacred Suicune.

    A couple of uneventful weeks later, whilst en route to Ecruteak via Moo Moo Farm, Lisa and Gavin are again accosted by Suicune. Lisa tries to battle Suicune, but he flees, leaving Lisa mystified as to why he appeared at all.

    At a riverside rest hut, Lisa is delighted to meet up again with Kris, who she met on the first day of her journey. While they reconnect, Gavin swims in the river, where Suicune confronts him underwater. Awed, Gavin is silent as Suicune creates an indigo/gold pokéball and gives it to him, saying that it will “help him”.

    Resurfacing, Gavin opens the ball, but it seems to be empty. He rejoins Kris and Lisa, who are battling, and decides not to mention his surreal experience just yet. After Lisa wins the battle, Kris decides to come with them to Moo Moo Farm.

    Later that night, Suicune secretly meets with Entei and Raikou, confirming that a mission has been a success. From the top of the Tin Tower, a phoenix eavesdrops on their conversation.


    Chapter 20 - Animal Magnetism.

    Suicune, Raikou and Entei are running, discussing how something was “unavoidable” and that “most people won’t believe him”; Raikou expresses regret about it. Entei and Raikou go to “make sure nobody finds out”, while Suicune goes “to check on ‘him’”.

    Meanwhile, Lisa, Gavin and Kris bond en route to Moo Moo Farm, and decide to compete in the farm’s monthly contest.

    Elsewhere, in bushland near Ecruteak, a bedraggled old man collapses whilst attempting to “warn them”. A few hundred metres away, Anna, en route to visit Lisa in Ecruteak, is cornered by a man who is apparently a Team Rocket agent. She escapes, but leaves behind some of her possessions, including a note containing Lisa’s address.

    Back at Moo Moo Farm, Lisa inadvertently catches a Magneton during an event. She also receives a phone call from Tom, who insists that she return to Ecruteak at once, though he won’t say why. Lisa explains to Kris and Gavin that her journey is over, and she needs to go home at once.

    Suicune watches them from afar, before wheeling around to attend to another pressing matter. Further afield, high in the sky, the phoenix watches the scene below, observing Lisa and remarking to itself that she will be “a legend”.

    -END OF BOOK ONE-
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 21st September 2009 at 10:40 AM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  16. #936
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book One Synopsis now posted!!! (24/06/09)

    No... this can't be it. There has to be more...
    *claws at the screen desperately*

    So, I've just spent the past two days immersed in your characters. Reading from the middle of book one right up to now. Reading seven years worth of character building, posts, replies and cringing at my own typing in my own replies.

    I've spent my time hoping that Gavin and Lisa will fall in love, being angry at Darius for taking Lisa's attention from Gavin, I've cried several times (such as when Gavin says goodbye) and I've been nothing but amazed AND inspired at the way you constantly evoke new action and new emotion into this story.

    You've helped me get past several writers blocks of my own, helping me to figure out how to continue writing Full Moon, and how to include action in a non pokemon story with things like war and hiding and chosen ones.

    I feel so empty now... there is nothing more to read.

    I swear, every time I thought it was over, every time I thought you were concluding, you suddenly turned it around and with a new twist you reinvented the wheel so to speak. Every time I expected a finish, there was only a new start. I expected Lisa to get to the safe house, and then Emma was dead. I expected Lisa to get out the mountain, and then there was the fighting all along the mountain side.

    Where is Marina now? I forget what happened to her.

    And I am still waiting for Lisa and Gavin to realise that they love each other and get together. Although, I think that really does need to come further on in the book, if it happens right now, it wont' be as built up as it could be.

    I bawled my eyes out when Lisa was reliving Gavin's torture though. Just so you're aware.

    Would you ever write this, as a non pokemon fiction? Although it would be harder... I think it would easily make a fantastic book. Right now, I haven't seen the huge use of pokemon since about book two - aside from the fact that it's based around legendary dogs. But still... A thought.

    Yeah. That's all



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  17. #937
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book One Synopsis now posted!!! (24/06/09)

    Quote Originally Posted by PancaKe View Post
    No... this can't be it. There has to be more...
    *claws at the screen desperately*

    So, I've just spent the past two days immersed in your characters. Reading from the middle of book one right up to now. Reading seven years worth of character building, posts, replies and cringing at my own typing in my own replies.

    I've spent my time hoping that Gavin and Lisa will fall in love, being angry at Darius for taking Lisa's attention from Gavin, I've cried several times (such as when Gavin says goodbye) and I've been nothing but amazed AND inspired at the way you constantly evoke new action and new emotion into this story.

    You've helped me get past several writers blocks of my own, helping me to figure out how to continue writing Full Moon, and how to include action in a non pokemon story with things like war and hiding and chosen ones.

    I feel so empty now... there is nothing more to read.

    I swear, every time I thought it was over, every time I thought you were concluding, you suddenly turned it around and with a new twist you reinvented the wheel so to speak. Every time I expected a finish, there was only a new start. I expected Lisa to get to the safe house, and then Emma was dead. I expected Lisa to get out the mountain, and then there was the fighting all along the mountain side.

    Where is Marina now? I forget what happened to her.

    And I am still waiting for Lisa and Gavin to realise that they love each other and get together. Although, I think that really does need to come further on in the book, if it happens right now, it wont' be as built up as it could be.

    I bawled my eyes out when Lisa was reliving Gavin's torture though. Just so you're aware.

    Would you ever write this, as a non pokemon fiction? Although it would be harder... I think it would easily make a fantastic book. Right now, I haven't seen the huge use of pokemon since about book two - aside from the fact that it's based around legendary dogs. But still... A thought.

    Yeah. That's all
    Thanks for the such a great reply, Tara! You don't know how cool it is to know that you were so absorbed in this fic that you spent two days reading through it all (and cried at Gavin's torture :O) ... I'm glad you still like it after all these years. I can't think of how to respond to some of the things you wrote other than to say thank you very much, and I'm glad Lisa the Legend has meant and means so much to you, especially with helping you with Full Moon.

    You asked about Marina: she's sitting pretty at the Guard's safe house as of Chapter 64, and will be making a reappearance in the fic soon.

    As for Lisa and Gavin ... haha, I'll say nothing to this end I don't think, but it's cool to hear your thoughts on this. I think Lisa may still be a little "distracted", but time will certainly tell.

    Would I consider rewriting this as a work of original fiction? Maybe. I've certainly thought about it, and tried at least once. It would definitely be possible - I'd probably drastically reduce the size of book one, though. And it would be very different to this incarnation of LTL. So, perhaps, one day, I would consider doing that, but I've got no concrete plans to do so at this stage.

    Don't claw at the screen too long ... there are more chapters coming very soon. I just need to get the Book II and III (so far) synopses posted first, and then get going with the chapter churning-out.

    Watch this space!

    Cheers!
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  18. #938
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book One Synopsis now posted!!! (24/06/09)

    I will watch very closely. Hee hee hee.

    Looking forward to it very much so. Very excited to see what happens.



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  19. #939
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book Two Synopsis (Part 1) now posted!!! (06/07/09)

    Tara: I'm glad you're excited; I am too!!!

    So, here's the next installment in the chapter synopses. I've split the synopsis of book two up into two parts for this, just because it's so enormous, so this post will synopsise chapters 21 through 39, and chapters 40 through 59 will be summarized shortly.



    Hope these are helpful! I'm definitely having fun doing them.

    Cheers!

    +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+

    Lisa the Legend – Synopsis.


    Book Two: Night Falls.


    Chapter 21 - Diverse Destinies.

    In the bushland near Ecruteak, Entei and Raikou accost Professor Oak, who has discovered information he is not supposed to know. Raikou disagrees with Entei’s murderous approach, and the two dogs battle. During the fray, Professor Oak flees into nearby scrub, where he runs directly into Lisa’s friend, Anna.

    Not far away, Lisa and Gavin are driving toward Ecruteak in response to Tom’s urgent call. After listening to radio reports about rumoured illegal activity by Joseph Sterling and Professor Oak’s disappearance.

    Night falls. Not far away from Lisa and Gavin, Kris and her pokémon have set up camp for the night, but are astonished by an explosion of fire in the distance.

    The same burst of flame catches the attention of Lisa and Gavin, who, believing it to be a small fire, turn around to help put it out with their water pokémon.


    Chapter 22 - Ultimate Confrontation.

    Lisa and Gavin are stunned to see that the fire has actually been maliciously caused by Entei: Professor Oak and Anna are stranded in the branches of a tree, which Entei has set alight.

    Suicune and Raikou are battling fiercely against Entei, who seems to have become maverick in his quest to protect their secrets.

    When Professor Oak loses his grip on the tree, Gavin inadvertently uses his psychic powers to rescue him. However, his powers are subsequently drained; Anna remains stranded in the burning tree. Relations between the three legendary dogs break down completely, and Entei attempts to kill Anna, however, his attempt is thwarted by Kris’ pokémon, who have arrived on the scene independent of their master to help.

    Enraged, Entei tries again, and succeeds. Anna is torn apart by his attack, tumbling, dead, into the flames.

    Distressed, Lisa and Gavin, allied with Suicune and Raikou, continue to battle Entei. After an enormous combination of attacks, Entei is defeated, but disappears from sight.

    The other legendary dogs follow suit, leaving Lisa and Gavin alone with an unconscious Professor Oak, overwhelmed by the utter devastation they have just witnessed.


    Chapter 23 - Repercussions.

    Lisa and Gavin awaken in an Ecruteak hospital, still recovering several days after the events at the burning tree. Their doctor helps them to remember what happened.

    A day later, Lisa’s brother Tom, his girlfriend Miki and their siblings Wesley and Jean come to the hospital to pick up Lisa and Gavin. Being around family again brings a sense of normalcy back to Lisa’s life, and she tries to put her harrowing experience behind her.


    Chapter 24 - Homeward Bound.

    Accompanied by Tom, Miki, Wesley and Jean, Lisa and Gavin head to the Ecruteak Pokémon Centre to retrieve their injured pokémon. Whilst there, they befriend an incompetent Nurse Joy, who requests their assistance in taming an unusual pokémon called Issechu. Gavin accepts Issechu on behalf of Lisa, much to her disgust.

    On the way home, they stop off at Tom’s work – the Ecruteak City Gym – for him to check in with Morty. Realising that she now has enough skill to challenge Morty, Lisa engages in a fierce one-on-one battle with him, Quagsire versus Gengar. During the battle, Quagsire evolves into the unknown pokémon Fiskmire.


    Chapter 25 - A Ghost of a Chance.

    Fiskmire’s added strength allows it to triumph over Gengar at last. Ecstatic, Lisa wins the Fog Badge.

    Back home after a long absence, Lisa enjoys the camaraderie of being with her family at her house again. Tom and Miki reveal that the reason they wanted her back in Ecruteak is that they have decided to get married, and the Engagement Party will be in just two days. They further reveal that Mr and Mrs Walters are returning for the party, and thus, Lisa needs to remain in Ecruteak and not travel anymore.

    After a mishap in a game of volleyball, Gavin loses Lisa’s Magneton for good. That afternoon, whilst meeting Kris at the pokémon centre, Lisa encounters Tyler again, and helps the nervous Nurse Joy stand up to him. Following the altercation, Joy asks Lisa to work with her at the pokémon centre, and Lisa agrees.


    Chapter 26 - The Engagement.

    After working an evening shift at the pokémon centre, Lisa and Elekid are attacked on a dark Ecruteak street.

    When Nurse Joy calls Miki at Lisa’s house that night, Miki realises that Lisa is missing, and alerts Tom, Gavin and the others.

    Meanwhile, Lisa’s captor reveals himself to be in the employ of Joseph Sterling. Shocked, she recognises him as the mysterious man she encountered outside the Radio Tower in October. He explains that he has been tracking her down for some time, and, after using information given by Professor Westwood under duress, he has located her at last. He believes he needs to kill her, and as he raises his weapon, Lisa shifts, dislodging the Crystal Bells in her backpack.

    Suicune is summoned by the bells, and appears almost instantly, saving Lisa from the bullet and killing the Team Rocket agent in the process.

    After being interviewed by police, Lisa is released into Tom’s custody. The next day, they all recover from the experience. Kris offers her buggy to Lisa and Gavin permanently, before adding that she intends to compete in the Johto League soon.

    Lisa’s parents return in time for the engagement party that evening – none the wiser to Lisa’s adventures. At the party, however, Suicune appears before Lisa and Gavin, apparently modifying the Sacred Ball that he gave to Gavin earlier.

    Unnerved, Lisa and Gavin decide to embark for a northern town, Port Valeo, the next day, to research at a library which specialises in information on the legendary pokémon. Satisfied that Lisa has a reliable chaperone, Lisa’s parents allow her to go with their blessing.


    Chapter 27 - Aquatics.

    Approaching the peninsula town of Port Valeo, Lisa and Gavin run into trouble when Kris’ buggy breaks down, stranding them on a beachside route. They decide to surf to town instead. During the journey, Lisa recalls a murky childhood memory of an incident in which she nearly drowned, only to be oddly rescued by a blue glow.

    Back in the present, Lisa and Gavin encounter a water pokémon trainer named Angela. After some confusion, Gavin agrees to battle Angela, and defeats her. However, the time taken to battle slows them down: when the group finally reach Port Valeo, the library they’re seeking is already closed for the day.

    Setting up camp for the night, Lisa and Gavin plan to launch their investigation the next day. However, while looking into an odd noise outside her tent, Lisa is abducted, witnessed only by Aipom.


    Chapter 28 - The Meetings and the Mystery. [Electric Buggy to Victory Crossover I - Part 1.]

    Waking up, Gavin finds that Lisa is missing, and rushes to find her. At the police station, he meets a fellow trainer named Andrew, however, the police are slow to assist them. Forced to wait while the police search, Gavin enlists Natu’s help with searching for Lisa and Jess, before joining Andrew on a boat belonging to his wealthy friends, Glenys and Ripper. However, the two argue when Andrew refuses to believe the legendary pokémon are real.

    Meanwhile, Lisa stirs to find herself locked in an office with a somewhat superficial, fashion-obsessed girl named Jessica. The two attempt to escape, meeting Jessica’s friend Phil along the way, who has also been kidnapped, but they are stopped in their tracks by their captor – a deranged scientist named Lenina Johnston, who forces Lisa and Jess to battle each other for their lives … literally.


    Chapter 29 - Showdown in Port Valeo. [Electric Buggy to Victory Crossover I - Part 2.]

    Lisa and Jess battle each other, trying to do as little damage to one another as possible so as to prolong their own lives.

    Still in limbo on the boat, Gavin and Andrew bond. Gavin recalls the painful memory of his mother and sister’s disappearance scarcely a year prior.

    Taking matters into their own hands, Lisa and Jess use their pokémons’ attacks to set Lenina’s laboratory on fire. In the ensuing chaos, they manage to escape, thanks to Gavin’s Natu teleporting them away.

    Celebrating their freedom, Lisa, Gavin and the others go back into town. Lisa tries to find the books on legendary pokémon at the Valeo Library, but is denied access to them on the grounds of her youth. Aipom, however, steals a book for Lisa under the librarian’s nose.

    Moments later, Lisa and Jess are attacked again by an enraged Lenina, who takes them into an abandoned alleyway and threatens them with an experimental mutant pokémon named ‘Cydm’. With the help of Andrew, Gavin and Phil, however, Lisa and Jess are able to defeat Lenina in battle, and subdue the Cydm. After the battle, Gavin’s Girafarig evolves into the new pokémon, Girafury.

    Lisa, Gavin and their new friends debrief after the battle; the librarian, grateful that they prevented Lenina destroying the library, allows Lisa to keep the book Aipom stole.

    Parting ways with Andrew, Jess and Phil, Lisa and Gavin take a flight back to Ecruteak, paid for by the generous Glenys and Ripper.


    Chapter 30 - Juxtaposition.

    The only chapter thus far that hasn’t featured either Lisa or Gavin: the reader is given three glimpses into three different characters’ lives outside the experience of Lisa and Gavin.

    Firstly, Joseph Sterling is shown reacting to the news that the Rocket agent who abducted Lisa earlier failed in his mission. He is shocked when he is approached by Entei, who offers to ally himself with Sterling as they both seek Lisa Walters. Later, Joseph is seen reviewing his leads, and, searching through the materials stolen from Anna, discovers that Marina Frost is also linked with Lisa.

    Secondly, Ecruteak’s incapable Nurse Joy is seen struggling to subdue an energetic Sandshrew. Failing, she enlists Issechu’s help to calm the Sandshrew. Frustrated by constant failure, she chases the Sandshrew out into the night.

    Lastly, Hiro Ferguson is seen arguing with his rival, Tyler, at the Johto League Tournament. Shortly after, he battles Karen, his next Elite Four opponent, and does an impressive job. However, while he battles, officials upstairs discover that a fake badge has been issued to some competitors, who must be disqualified from the tournament – one of whom is Hiro.


    Chapter 31 - Friends.

    Arriving at Ecruteak Airport, Gavin teleports Lisa, Aipom and himself back to the front garden of Lisa’s house, though not without considerable pain to himself. Met there by Wes and Jean, they are stunned when Lunanine appears before them for the second time. Before they can battle it properly, however, it disappears anticlimactically.

    Frightened by the experience, Wes and Jean confess it to their parents, and accidentally spill the beans about Lisa’s travels, provoking a major discussion between Lisa and her parents.

    Later on, Lisa stands on her balcony, reading the book she obtained in Port Valeo and revelling in the warm summer evening. When Gavin joins her, they have a serious discussion about their plans, and about Gavin’s family curse. Gavin appears significantly distressed about something. He proposes that he and Lisa battle, but she refuses, saying it’s too late. Instead, they play a game of basketball together.

    Meanwhile, Marina is seen canoeing towards Ecruteak, planning to visit Lisa. She is abruptly confronted by two apparent Team Rocket agents, but uses her powerful pokemon to fight them off successfully, before continuing on her way. Unbeknownst to her, a periscope follows behind her in the river.


    Chapter 32 - Tin Tower Terror.

    Lisa receives a call from Hiro, who appeals for her to give him the Fog Badge so that he can compete in the league battles. Lisa agrees, and with her parents’ blessing, she leaves behind the warm safety of her home and sets out to Silver City to deliver the Fog Badge to Hiro, accompanied once more by Gavin and Aipom.

    Meanwhile, Nurse Joy and Issechu find themselves in the middle of a harrowing night-time experience in the bushland near the Tin Tower when, while chasing Sandshrew, they encounter Lunanine battling a bedraggled man – none other than Gavin’s uncle, Eusine. Joy watches in horror as Eusine is brutally murdered in battle by the black beast; then, Lunanine turns on her, wiping her memory.



    Chapter 33 - Icy Inferno.


    En route to Silver City, Lisa receives a call from her mother telling her that Marina has arrived in Ecruteak City, wanting to catch up with her. Lisa promises to call once she reaches Silver City.

    She and Gavin reach the Ice Path, and despite warnings, they drive the buggy through it. Part way through, they are confronted by Suicune and Entei, who are locked in a vicious battle with one another, unconcerned by Lisa and Gavin’s presence. Suicune, however, shrouds Lisa and Gavin in a magical bubble to protect them from stray attacks.

    The battle rages on. Eventually, Suicune appears to have killed Entei, who bursts into flames which engulf the Ice Path, melting part of it. In the explosion, the protective bubble around Lisa and Gavin bursts, and they are plunged deep into an icy black pool of water, with no escape.


    Chapter 34 - The Flight of the Phoenix.

    Lisa and Gavin both experience what they can only explain as an ethereal dream – but both of them are quietly sure that it happened in reality. Following the events on the Ice Path, they appear to be flown across the countryside on the backs of two legendary birds – Lisa on Ho-oh and Gavin on Lugia – before being delivered safely onto a grassy hillside near Silver City.


    Chapter 35 - Welcome to Mt. Silver.

    Lisa and Gavin, bewildered by their individual experiences, debrief, but cannot come to any conclusions about what just happened to them. As yet, they have scarcely mentioned the event since; they are both too confused by it.

    Lisa finds Hiro at a local café and gives him her Fog Badge. Thrilled, he thanks her and goes immediately to challenge Lance Hudson, the Elite Four Champion. Lisa and Gavin decide to go along to the stadium, joining an enormous crowd to witness the biggest match they have ever seen before.


    Chapter 36 - The League Final.

    Lisa and Gavin are amazed as an epic showdown unfolds between Lance and Hiro, who seems surprisingly skilled.

    Lisa chats to a boy in the seat beside her at the match, who turns out to be Darius Hudson, the son of Lance! Lisa finds herself attracted to his good looks and friendly personality, and they begin to bond as the battle continues.

    As a new round between Hiro’s Dewgong and Lance’s Aerodactyl begins, the stadium is taken by surprise: Aerodactyl begins to evolve for the first time in history.


    Chapter 37 - More than a Battle.

    The battle between Lance and Hiro rages on. After some thrilling rounds, the final round consists of Lance’s rose-gold Dragonite, Draco, against Hiro’s almost impossibly high-levelled acrobatic Weedle.

    In a major upset that even Lance can’t help smiling about, Hiro defeats Lance.

    Meanwhile, in Ecruteak, Marina is introduced to Miki and other members of Lisa’s family.

    Elsewhere in Ecruteak, a shadowy figure called ‘boss’ violently murders a subservient agent, who he calls a backstabber.


    Chapter 38 - Tyler versus Hiro versus Kristal.

    Later, Hiro is inducted into the Hall of Fame by Lance, who then sets about assessing Hiro’s team. He is flabbergasted when Weedle’s experience level is revealed to be 81. Hiro decides that his next goal will be to battle the other trainers who have defeated Lance.

    Hiro discovers that two of these trainers are none other than Tyler and Kris, who await him outside the Hall of Fame induction chambers. They engage in a venomous three-way battle, which is almost as epic as the league battle between Hiro and Lance. In the end, Hiro and Kris (who had fallen out months earlier) rekindle their friendship amid a shared hatred of Tyler, and defeat him in battle, deciding not to keep fighting after he leaves. They decide to journey together once again and take on the Orange Islands league.

    In Silver City, Lisa’s new friend Darius joins her and Gavin in their quest for a hotel to spend the night in. After they are refused a room because they are underage, Darius name-drops his father and they are allowed to stay.

    While enjoying her hotel room, Lisa receives a knock on the door from a woman named Melanie, who is looking for Gavin to inform him of Eusine’s death. Lisa is shocked by the news, and goes with Melanie to the hotel pool, where Gavin and their pokémon are frolicking.

    When Melanie breaks the news of Eusine’s death, Gavin breaks down completely. After the two go off and have a private discussion, Melanie returns to the pool to tell Lisa that Gavin has fled in grief and supposedly intends to return to Ecruteak. Feeling as though she is unable to be alone in the wild world alone, Lisa turns to Darius, thinking that perhaps she will find a new travelling partner in him.


    Chapter 39 - Christmas Crush.

    Shortly after the events at Silver City, Lisa is returned to Ecruteak by Darius, who then, to her disappointment, immediately returns to Silver City. She finds herself developing a crush on him.

    However, she has other things to worry about. Joyfully reunited with Marina, who bunks with her in her room, they spend Christmas Eve at the Lakeside Mall, finding presents for their family and friends, including their pokémon. Running through towel racks to avoid the throng of Christmas shoppers, they discover a hidden section of a department store called the Battlemagic section. Marina buys herself a miniature Guardian Butterfree, while Lisa purchases a Buzzball, some Aquaflox, and several other items. The two girls have an enjoyable day, and Marina is particularly amused when she finds out about Lisa’s crush on Darius.

    On Christmas morning, Wes, Jean, Marina and Lisa receive an impressive haul of gifts. Lisa is amazed to see that there is a present from Gavin left under the tree; she wonders when he put it there. It turns out to be a poképort, which she decides to store Aipom in instead of his pokéball.

    At the family dinner that evening, Lisa and Marina are sitting outside when Lisa sees, in the distance, a mysterious streak of golden-red light.
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 6th July 2009 at 07:44 AM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  20. #940
    Beginning Trainer
    Beginning Trainer
    Cadmus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    99

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book Two Synopsis (Ch21 - Ch39) now posted!!! (6th July 2009)

    It's good that you're doing these summaries. I really found it daunting to try and catch up with the whole series. Especially with some massive chapters along the way lol. But this really makes things easier. I can decide which chapter seems really appealing to read as well. The story is really intriguing. Poor Gavin, losing his Uncle and Lisa having feelings for Darius. And Lisa... she has a habit of getting kidnapped quite often, eh? Heh.

    Can't wait for the next part of the summaries. This is really an epic story.

  21. #941
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book Two Synopsis (Ch21 - Ch39) now posted!!! (6th July 2009)

    Cadmus: Thanks. You're right: I knew Lisa had had her fair share of being taken captive by people, but it was only when I did the synopsis that I realised quite how often it's happened. Still, makes sense I reckon.

    And yes, epic indeed!!!

    Here's the second half of Book Two - the synopses are nearly done guys! Prepare yourselves for ... well ... you'll see!!!!!

    +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+

    Lisa the Legend - Synopsis.


    Chapter 40 - Missing.

    Two uneventful months have passed since Christmas. Lisa is home again in Ecruteak and more bored and restless – and alone – than ever before. Gavin has still not been seen since receiving the news of his Uncle Eusine’s death at Silver City; Lisa’s crush, Darius has failed to re-establish contact with Lisa; and even Marina has left for a week of canoeing in the Tokor river system.

    Everything changes, however, on the day Marina returns from her trip. Lisa is thrilled to see her friend again, but events take a mysterious turn when she receives two letters in the post. One, from Gavin, turns out to be two months old, causing Lisa to panic that something may have happened to him since then. When Marina tries to calm her down, the two argue, only to have Marina’s Guardian Butterfree break them apart.

    Taken aback by the wave of emotion, Lisa reconciles with Marina and the two girls decide to spend some time at Ecru Lake fishing and swimming. In the process, Lisa forgets about opening the second letter she received – a message from the Johto Ministry of Justice.

    Meanwhile, in an office somewhere, a mystery man orders the death of an unnamed suspect.


    Chapter 41 - Waterfalls and Warnings.

    Lisa and Marina bask in the afternoon heat at Ecru Lake, unsuccessful in their fishing ventures. In the distance, Lisa catches a glimpse of the Tin Tower, and, her thoughts wandering to her many experiences with the legendary pokémon, she accidentally verges on revealing her encounters to Marina. Deciding against telling Marina her secrets, Lisa covers and asks Marina for a pokémon battle.

    As Marina’s Bayleef, Herby, defeats Lisa’s Elekid, a beam of light appears out of nowhere, rushing at the girls and ending their battle. Marina falls to the ground – apparently fainting, Lisa believes – as the beam of light forms into Raikou, who desperately tells Lisa that Entei has betrayed him, and that Lisa is hunted and must focus on training her pokémon and protecting herself.

    Appearing to have no memory of the event, Marina goes shopping, while Lisa remains at the lake and fervently trains her pokémon, who are becoming increasingly formidable.


    Chapter 42 - Invasion from the Inside.

    Buoyed by her successes at Ecru Lake, Lisa returns home to find it empty. Not overly concerned, she relaxes for awhile before noticing the letter from the Johto Ministry of Justice. Reading it, she discovers she is required to attend a court case for the trial of Lenina Johnson, the Team Rocket scientist who attacked her, Jessica and Phil in Port Valeo.

    After hearing some mysterious noises in the house, Lisa has a hand clapped over her mouth by a pale-faced Marina, who informs her that there are two people who have invaded the house. Sneaking around the house carefully, Lisa spies the two people, who appear to be Team Rocket agents, riffling through her parents’ desk.

    Marina and Lisa attempt to escape the house, but are caught by the invaders. A duel ensues, Lisa and Marina using their battlemagic items and pokémon to combat the Stunners of the Rocket agents. After Marina is taken out, Lisa is attacked by a man but, just as she is about to pass out, a mysterious force overcomes her, lifting her up into the air and away, into the night …


    Chapter 43 - Return to Port Valeo. [EBTV Crossover II - Part 1.]

    Lisa soars, apparently by magic, through the night air, completely nonplussed at how she is being transported; though she rules out teleportation, as it is taking such a long time. Eventually, she is thrown unceremoniously onto a beach near the Port Valeo lighthouse. In utter disbelief at the evening’s events, she passes out on the beach.

    The next morning, with her newly-evolved Electabuzz, Lisa returns to Port Valeo thanks to the help of Paula Somerville, a traveller. Lisa is still baffled by the previous night’s events; her confusion only deepens when she discovers that her poképort is missing.

    In the centre of the village of Port Valeo, Lisa runs into Jessica Hall – and her annoying, superficial cousin Olivia – in a berry shop. She reacquaints herself with the whole gang – Andrew, Glenys and Ripper – and glosses over the murky details of her last few months. When asked about Gavin, she dismissively lies that he will be joining them tomorrow.

    That night – as Lisa goes to close the curtains of the hotel room Glenys and Ripper provided for her – she receives a complete shock. Gavin Luper is standing outside her window.


    Chapter 44 - Gavin's Tale.

    Weak, injured and sporting an enormous scar on his left cheek, Gavin recounts to Lisa what happened to him after Silver City: shortly after his uncle’s funeral, he was kidnapped by the Union, only recently escaping. He tells Lisa that while he was being held by the Union, he met a fellow prisoner – none other than their old friend Professor Westwood.

    Although angry at his unexplained disappearance, Lisa bites her tongue, glad that he is still alive, though his dishevelled appearance worries her. She relates her story to Gavin before, in the wee hours of the morning, they return to the hotel room, unaware of the bushes rustling as they leave.


    Chapter 45 - The Court Case. [EBTV Crossover II - Part 2.]

    The police officer in charge of the Lenina Johnson case informs Lisa, Gavin, Andrew and Jessica that the trial has been put back a day and warns them that they may be in danger from Lenina’s associates who may attempt to attack them to prevent the trial.

    With a more relaxed day ahead, Lisa, Gavin and the others have a leisurely breakfast in the resort’s dining hall. Lisa meets Gavin’s friend Brent at breakfast, and, while reading the local newspaper, discovers that Professor Oak has once again disappeared – this time near the seaside town of Dervine. The teenagers pass the rest of the day on Valeo Beach, with Gavin defeating Andrew in a battle before Jessica crushes Lisa.

    The next day, a police escort delivers Lisa, Gavin and the others to the courthouse, where they fight their way through a media throng to get inside the building.

    Only minutes after the trial begins, the courtroom is ambushed by smoke bombs and armed rebels. Amid the chaos of fistfights and gunbattles, Lisa and Jessica hold their own against the attackers, eventually stumbling onto a tense scene among the smoke: Lenina, subdued, is on the floor. Standing over her, gun aimed at her chest, is Gavin, though he is clearly incapable of murdering Lenina. As he lowers his gun, a mysterious figure, still obscured in the haze, runs up behind him and commits the deed, killing Lenina.

    After a lengthy debrief, the trial is cancelled. Told that she will have to remain in police custody after reporting the invasion of her home, Lisa skilfully flees the Valeo Police Station. Lisa and Gavin part ways with Andrew, Jessica and Olivia, deciding to surf south to Dervine and investigate the mystery of Professor Oak’s latest disappearance.


    Chapter 46 - Intuition.

    En route to Dervine, Lisa, Gavin and Aipom sunbathe on a tranquil beach, when a sudden series of deafening explosions in the inland forest startles them out of their reverie. Concerned, Lisa decides to investigate the explosions, despite Gavin’s warnings: she experiences an odd, inexplicable intuition that she is needed there.

    They race through the forest, using Gavin’s new Skarmory to slash through the thick vegetation and Lisa’s Vulpix to blast their way through a terrifying Spinarak nest. When they finally reach a barren gorge, a final explosion blasts smoke into the air around them. When the smoke clears, Lisa discovers that her intuition had led her to the right place after all: lying in the gorge, clearly dead, is Raikou.


    Chapter 47 - Night Falls.

    Reeling from the shock of Raikou’s death, Lisa and Gavin conclude that Entei must be the culprit. Shellshocked, they walk onwards, heading ever closer to Dervine and hoping to find somewhere to spend the evening. As night falls, a storm hits, and Lisa sees what appears to be a silhouette of a large man in the bushes very close to them. Convinced that ex-Team Rocket members may be nearby, Lisa and Gavin panic. Alone in the eerie forest, they have no choice but to keep walking, until they finally take refuge in an empty wooden hut provided for travellers.

    To their shock, however, a vehicle pulls up outside the hut while they are inside. Hiding beneath the futon, Lisa and Gavin are stunned to see four members of the Organisation enter the room, with Marina held captive among them. Using Vulpix to distract the agents by setting their jeep on fire, Lisa struggles with her morals before disarming Marina’s remaining guard by shooting him in the knee with Gavin’s newly-acquired handgun.

    Rescuing Marina, Lisa, Gavin, Aipom and Vulpix flee the hut and the agents, escaping into the darkness of the surrounding forest.

    That same night in Ecruteak City, an unidentified man is violently interrogated by three shadowy agents.


    Chapter 48 - The Union.

    Taking refuge in a roadhouse on the Dervine Expressway later that night, Lisa comes clean with Marina about the events of the past months – including the appearances of the legendary pokémon and the Organisation’s pursuit of her. Marina believes Lisa, and then tells her side of the story, revealing that the Organisation of ex-Team Rocket members is now an amalgam of various gangs and terrorist factions, known as the Union.

    Marina agrees to travel with Gavin and Lisa to Dervine. While they discuss their plans over coffee, Lisa receives a panicked call from her brother, Tom, who has just arrived home from his trip to find the house deserted: Lisa’s parents and younger siblings have not made contact with him. Lisa arranges for Tom to meet her in Dervine as soon as possible; in the meantime, she, Marina and Gavin set about planning how to proceed with their plans.


    Chapter 49 - Golden Horizons.

    Following a secret meeting between the legendary pokémon, Gavin’s psychic powers return to him overnight. After a decent sleep, Marina confesses that she would rather go back to the safety of her home in Tokor than go to Dervine with the others. She hitches a ride on a tourist coach, leaving Lisa and Gavin to fathom a way to get to Dervine.

    Shortly after, they notice a sign for a pokémon contest on nearby Mount Fairfax, and decide to enter it: the first prize is a solar-powered buggy.

    Elsewhere, Lance Hudson, leader of the Elite Four, receives a written message. He calls in his assistant, a girl named Sarah, who expresses her disbelief, saying, “That key was definitely secure.” Lance asserts that he trusts the source, and asks something of Sarah that is of what he calls “the utmost secrecy”.


    Chapter 50 - The Informant.

    Reaching the base of Mount Fairfax much later that night, Lisa and Gavin approach the rustic Fairfax Inn and meet its eccentric Irish owner, Paddy. Lisa and Gavin sign up for the next day’s contest and before going to their rooms for the night inadvertently have a bitter argument which they do not resolve.

    During the night, Lisa is abducted by a man who promises to be working against the Union; he acts as an informant, giving her disclosure on many of the recent mysterious events. He explains the background of the Union and tells Lisa more about the appearance of Lunanine in the Video Vault, and warns her that Union members may have infiltrated the contest posing as contestants, and that she ought to be on her guard. However, he raises more questions than he answers, refusing to admit who he works for.

    Lisa is returned to the Fairfax Inn, exhausted and even more confused than she was before.


    Chapter 51 - The Dream.

    That night, Lisa has an extremely vivid dream, involving her, Marina and Gavin, as well as some mysterious keys, a couple of odd wooden boxes, a laboratory and some strange sceptres.

    At some point, the dream changes and becomes very much real: Lisa witnesses a scene in which Gavin is brutally tortured for information by a Union interrogator. Horrified, Lisa watches as Gavin is punished for refusing to give any information: she finally learns how the scar on his left cheek came to be.

    She wakes up screaming – and absolutely certain that she has just seen into the past.


    Chapter 52 - Mount Fairfax.

    Overwhelmed, Lisa calls her brother, Tom, and finally divulges everything she has been through. Once the sun rises, she joins a throng of contestants for a meal in the breakfast hall, meeting a friendly fellow trainer named Daniel Rudd along the way. Paddy announces that the race to the summit of Mount Fairfax will begin shortly. Lisa and Gavin reconcile from the night before.

    [Meanwhile, Professor Oak dupes a couple of unintelligent Union grunts, who, believing him to be dead, remove him from his cavernous prison.]

    The race begins. Lisa and Gavin, accompanied by three pokémon each, navigate their way through a series of exciting obstacles and challenges, felling massive trees to cross a wild stream, fending off a troupe of angry Bellsprout, climbing a magical golden rope net and sliding through hidden ice tunnels, among other things.

    [Threatening his own suicide to keep the Union agents at bay, Professor Oak escapes their grasp.]

    Lisa and Gavin reach the summit of Mount Fairfax, apparently the first to arrive. Though the plateau is deserted, they can hear Daniel and his friends nearby, apparently in trouble.

    They approach the plateau with caution, when suddenly, the torches go out, and Lunanine appears before them, utterly enraged.


    Chapter 53 - The Defector.

    Lisa and Gavin back themselves against a rock wall in terror of Lunanine. Lisa uses her Buzzball to attack Lunanine before it attacks them, and to her complete bewilderment, the “electrify” move knocks the enormous legendary unconscious. It is only when Lisa inspects the beast’s body that she sees a bloody wound and realises that it was not her Buzzball attack that felled Lunanine …

    With a rude shock, Lisa and Gavin realise the plateau is surrounded by Union agents – that Lunanine was trying to protect the two of them from harm.

    Unable to stand a chance against the Union, Lisa and Gavin are taken captive.

    Further down the mountain, an enormous battle erupts between the Union and some policemen.

    While guarded by three Union agents, Lisa and Gavin fall asleep in despair. They are awakened when one of the agents spontaneously shoots the other two, apparently killing them instantly.

    The agent reveals himself to be named Derek and insists he is “good” and will take them to safety. He reveals that he has something called the O’Malley file and knows where the “Second Key” is: he instructs Lisa to pass the information to Lance.

    Lisa is completely thrown by the news that Lance Hudson, Champion of the Elite Four, is apparently involved in some kind of anti-Union force. Before she can drag any answers out of Derek, however, he delivers her and Gavin to a small, enclosed cave and tells them to hide there. His job apparently done, he leaves them to join the massive battle below.

    Some time later, a female agent delivers a newcomer to the cave. Lisa and Gavin are stunned: the newcomer is none other than Professor Oak, the very man they have been seeking.

    He begins to explain his disappearance; and as he does so, Lisa realises that the long night is only just beginning.


    Chapter 54 - The Professor's Tale.

    Professor Oak tells Lisa that he overheard of an ancient legend evoked by Suicune, Raikou and Entei, and that the Legend involves her, Lisa, and has a binding power over her life.

    Lisa talks at length with Professor Oak, who reveals – in detail – the truth about his disappearance in December and his most recent abduction, discussing Professor Westwood, the Union and the Legend.

    Ever closer to full disclosure, Lisa wonders if there is an anti-Union force present on the mountain. Professor Oak explains that a battle is still raging on the mountain, and yet nobody is coming to rescue them from the cave.

    Tired of waiting, Lisa drifts off to sleep again.


    Chapter 55 - The Deceiver.

    Lisa awakens to hear Gavin sobbing in the dark. She speaks to him and reveals that she knows he was tortured by the Union and that he is scared they will do it again. He collapses and Lisa comforts him as best she can.

    Lisa, Gavin and Oak are finally picked up by a man who Lisa realises is her mystery informant from the previous night – and finally she recognises him fully: Morty, the Ecruteak City Gym Leader.

    [Atop the Tin Tower, the Phoenix stirs, clearly troubled.]

    Morty delivers them to a trio of people he claims are working against the Union – however, just before they are handed over, Lisa recognises one of the trio as a Union agent she battled with in the Port Valeo courtroom. Acting in the nick of time, Lisa uses the Buzzball to electrocute the nearest Union agent. Morty’s deception exposed – he was a double agent loyal to the Union – a vicious, no-holds-barred pokémon battle breaks out between him and Lisa, while Gavin and Professor Oak fend off the other two Union agents.

    Victorious after the battle, Lisa realises that the entire night has been a Union set-up. Consulting with Gavin and Professor Oak, they agree that the right thing to do is fight. Arming themselves with the Union agents’ various weapons, the trio charge boldly downhill, to face whatever chaos may await them.


    Chapter 56 - The First Battle.

    It is close to three in the morning when the trio finally reaches the scene of the epic battle between the Union and the opposing forces. Gavin, Lisa and Professor Oak all charge into battle – only to be thrown into the most chaotic and deadly męlée they have ever seen.

    Lisa loses track of the others immediately. She runs to help a man who is apparently being slaughtered, but is staved off by a Murkrow. When she finally reaches him, he is dead, and the Union agent who killed him has escaped, stealing something from around the dead man’s neck. Lisa has no choice but to continue battling.

    After many loud explosions, bursts of fire, bullets, smoke and myriad attacks whizzing through the air, Lisa is unexpectedly shot in the back by a Union agent.

    Weak, bleeding and numb, Lisa doesn’t even fight back as the agent attempts to knock her unconscious. However, before he succeeds, there is a flash of electricity: Daniel and his friend appear and ward off the agent for good.

    While an injured Lisa rests, the battle in the clearing begins to subside: Gavin, Professor Oak, Derek and the others have triumphed. Daniel and Nova run to celebrate with them, leaving Lisa convalescing on the edge of the clearing. While she lays there – and while the battlers rejoice – she receives a horrible shock. A hundred shadowy figures are creeping forward: the Union have, once again, duped and encircled their prey.

    Aware that she is the only one who has noticed the Union, Lisa boldly sends Aipom out in full attack mode.


    Chapter 57 - The Beginning.

    Lisa’s valiant attempt to save her friends fails: the Union overrun the clearing and defeat everyone still standing, including her.

    When she wakes up, she is in an enormous cavern within Mount Fairfax, listening to Joseph Sterling deliver a victory speech to his army of hundreds of Union agents. He declares that he has possession of the First and Second Keys.

    He compels Lisa to enter the Sepulchre of Entei, which adjoins the cavern they are in. Lisa is taunted by the Union army and initially defies Joseph Sterling’s orders, which prompts him to strike her. Eventually, the Union hold Gavin as hostage and threaten to kill him unless Lisa acquiesces: Lisa reluctantly agrees.

    Veronica escorts Lisa into the cavernous, mystical Sepulchre of Entei. However, when they reach the entrance doors to the Sepulchre proper, it explodes in fire and ash, appearing to be a dormant volcano that begins to erupt with lava. Lisa and Veronica flee in panic; whilst escaping, they come across Lance Hudson and Darius, who are pelting the other way, urgently needing to access and quell the Sepulchre of Entei.

    Relieved that she has been saved, Lisa takes Darius’ Stantler and re-emerges in the enormous cavern, where she sees another męlée has broken out – except the Union is very clearly losing now, and in retreat. Several pokémon trainers are battling the Union, including two brilliant trainers who, standing back-to-back, utilise a dozen pokémon between them to create an impenetrable offensive against what remains of the Union agents.

    As the smoke clears and the battle draws to a close, a couple of trainers call out to Lisa, who freezes in absolute disbelief.

    Two of the trainers who almost single-handedly defeated the Union are her mother and father.

    Lisa faints from shock.


    Chapter 58 - Behind the Glass.

    After the war on Mount Fairfax, Joseph Sterling and Veronica take a helicopter to safety. Sterling admits that he personally killed Professor Oak, and that he plans to make a public announcement as soon as he reaches Union HQ.

    In a conference room at the Fairfax Inn, Lance struggles to deal with conflict within his anti-Union organisation.

    Lisa wakes up, distressed, and demands to the emergency nurse, a young woman named Emma, to see her parents.

    Ryan and Maria Walters – Lisa’s parents – explain everything to Lisa in absolute detail. They explain the details of the Legend of Ecruteak, which details the mystic hidden power contained behind an Iron Lock somewhere in the ancient ruins around Ecruteak City. This Iron Lock requires seven special keys to be opened – keys which have been meticulously hidden and forgotten about for centuries. One of these keys is broken into three fragments, with each fragment guarded in the dual custody of one legendary beast and one human being who is bound to that beast, becoming a Guardian. Lisa learns that, through her bloodline, she is the Guardian of Suicune, and that Darius Hudson and Marina Frost are the guardians of Entei and Raikou respectively.

    It turns out that the Union seeks the keys to unlock the hidden, unlimited reservoir of power supposed to be contained within the Iron Lock; Joseph Sterling intends to use the power for his own greedy and terrible whims.

    For the first time, Lisa sees the bigger picture behind the events of the last four months of her life. She finally understands the Union’s endless pursuit of her, as well as the legendary beasts’ fascination with her.

    Her parents explain that they are founding members of a group called the Guard, which is led by Lance and the former Guardians. They seek to block the Union from accessing the Iron Lock by obtaining at least one key, if not more, for themselves.

    Lisa struggles with a broad range of extreme emotions.

    Eventually, after finding out that Gavin is alright, she seeks out Darius, and the two talk, and find some common ground as they are both Guardians and have both experienced the same rude awakening.

    After speaking to the rest of the Guard, Lance officially declares “war” on the Union.


    Chapter 59 - Burnt Sunset.

    Lisa recovers in the makeshift hospital ward that now exists in the Fairfax Inn. She tries to take in the enormity of what has happened – that the world has been forever changed, that a state of war now exists – but nothing sinks in until she and Gavin speak to each other, realising that their old lives, plans and dreams are no longer going to be achievable.

    Lisa debriefs with Daniel, Nova and Paddy, claiming third prize for the contest, which consists of a Dive Ball and a Max Repel.

    With the help of Emma, the inexperienced nurse, Lisa and Gavin are put on the same helicopter flight, along with Lisa’s parents, which will take them to Redwood Hospital to recover properly from the previous night. However, everyone receives a shock when they see the Medivac helicopter also contains the body of Professor Oak.

    Numb with shock, Lisa steels herself for the reality of what lies ahead: a war. As she reconciles herself with this new truth, the helicopter departs Mount Fairfax for Redwood City.


    -END OF BOOK TWO-
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 5th August 2009 at 04:52 PM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  22. #942
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Book Three Synopsis so far (Ch60 - Ch64) now up!

    Hey guys!

    The final chapter synopses are here: this one takes us from the start of Book III (Chapter 60) to the most recently-posted chapter (Chapter 64) which you may note, possibly with horror, was posted exactly one year ago today.

    That's the longest break between posted chapters for this fic in it's history, but I'm rather untroubled by this, as this break has also coincided with the most prolific period of LTL writing that I've had for many years. Yes, many years.

    So, don't worry, because new chapters are going to hit your screen very soon, I just need a little more time to ... well ... I can't say what yet, but basically, I need more time before new chapters go up. But not much more time. Within the month, the ball should be rolling, I hope. I'd like to be going much faster, but I'm in the middle of my final semester of my degree, which is something I really don't want to stuff up; thus, I'm prioritising my studies, naturally, but this fic will be progressing, a lot, and very soon. Trust me.

    Also, I want to thank you all for the awards LTL and I received at the 2009 Silver Pencil Awards: your dedication and loyalty to this fic is appreciated more and more with each year that passes. So, thanks to all readers, and I hope what's coming will reward your commitment in some way!

    One last thing: the title of Book III has been changed to Rogue. I hope you find it interesting (your responses are always more than welcome) and I think it serves as a nice teaser for what's on the horizon for Lisa the Legend.

    I'm going to return to the current chapter I'm working on now and let you readers - old and new - get up to speed with the last few chapters of this fic so far. Hope you enjoy.

    Not long to go now! Woooooot!

    Cheers, everyone!

    - Gavin.

    +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+

    Lisa the Legend – Synopsis.

    Lisa the Legend III: Rogue.


    Chapter 60 - Letters.

    After a month stuck in Redwood Hospital following complications from the bullet wound she received on Mt Fairfax, Lisa is told by Nurse Emma that she is free to return home the following day. Ecstatic to be leaving after so many weeks of feeling cooped up, trapped and depressed, Lisa writes to Gavin to inform him of the news. They have both been kept on the ward while recovering from their ordeal, and have taken to frequent letter-writing to keep in touch.

    Lisa signs a discharge form and realises that she really will be departing at last and joining Marina and Darius at the Guard’s Safe House. Despite her weeks in hospital, she has followed the Union-Guard war in the newspapers and is aching to have more insight into what’s going on behind the scenes.

    In his reply letter, Gavin asks Lisa to come and see him in person before she leaves the hospital: he has something serious he says he must discuss with her.

    Chapter 61 - The Promise.

    The following morning, Lisa suffers from an acute panic attack. Comforted by Emma, Lisa is promptly counselled by the resident youth psychologist, Doctor Tanner, who talks Lisa through her past trauma and explains that her emotional response was long overdue, given all the things that have happened to her in the past.

    Relieved after her talk with Doctor Tanner, Lisa goes to see Gavin in his room. He has lost a great amount of weight and is dangerously thin thanks to the physical trauma he suffered on Mount Fairfax; his head is also shaved.

    After catching up with Lisa briefly, Gavin tells her he is not going to return with her to the Safe House, but instead will embark on his own mission to uncover the secrets of his family’s curse – beginning with a trip to Cianwood Island to visit a Seer. Lisa is upset at Gavin for leaving her before accepting the reality of the situation; when Gavin becomes vulnerable and asks her to take care of his affairs in the event of his death, Lisa promises to always be there for him.

    Chapter 62 - Union Supremacy.

    As Lisa begins to leave Gavin’s room – her parents will be arriving to pick her up at any moment – he asks for his camera back from her backpack. She returns to her room to retrieve the camera. After picking it up, she sees through the window that her parents’ car is in the carpark.

    Deciding to meet them on their way up, Lisa runs to the elevator. When it opens, however, she receives the shock of her life: Nurse Emma’s body lies bleeding in the lift, riddled with bullet holes.

    Lisa screams and vomits in shock; Gavin and the other patients on the ward are roused by her scream and come running, only to respond in a similar manner. Below, they can hear the sound of battle: an enormous męlée has broken out on the hospital’s lower floors.

    Responding quickly, Lisa and Gavin barricade themselves and the other patients in Gavin’s room. Lisa retrieves her backpack from her room and, while glancing out the window, sees that the battle has spilled into the carpark, too.

    Back in Gavin’s room, Gavin and Lisa arrange for the other patients to escape the hospital with help from their pokémon. When just he and Lisa remain, Gavin prepares his powers to teleport them to safety; however, before he is able to, a Union agent stuns him, sending him to the ground, unconscious. The agent turns his weapon on Lisa and pulls the trigger.

    Chapter 63 - Submission.

    Gavin’s camera on her chest saves Lisa from being stunned by the Union agent’s attack. Playing dead, she fools the agent – Anthony – long enough to release Fiskmire, who attacks him. Meanwhile, Gavin awakens and, using his powers, he, Lisa and Fiskmire temporarily overcome the two Union agents.

    Gavin tries to teleport himself and Lisa but fails; his energy has been depleted. When he attempts a second time, he manages only to teleport himself: Lisa is left behind amid the stirring Union agents.

    Running down the stairwell, she joins forces with a Guard agent, Christina, who explains that the Union got wind that Lisa was being extracted today and attempted to seize her, but were met with a counterattack by Guard agents, including Lisa’s parents. Lisa and Christina approach the ground floor of the hospital, but when they finally emerge from the stairwell, they are ambushed by Union agents.

    Defenceless, Lisa is taken down and captured by the Union.

    Chapter 64 - Heart of Ice.

    Finding himself bitterly reminiscent of his own father, Guard leader Lance Hudson sifts through paperwork after the ambush at Redwood Hospital. Guard member Jim Donovan confronts him about the attack, demanding to know whether Lance knowingly sent him and his agents into an ambush. Lance denies any knowledge that the Army, who were guarding the hospital, had been infiltrated by the Union.

    After a fierce argument with Donovan, Lance reveals that he has no plans of extracting Lisa from the Union’s base as it would be a suicide mission for the Guard. Enraged that Lance has given up on saving Lisa, Donovan leaves the office, but not before Lance reveals that he and Lisa’s parents have argued already on the matter.

    Left alone in his office, Lance returns to a month-old report that proved Union infiltration in Johto’s army, and becomes worried, rather than comforted, by a note from his father telling him that it will ‘become easier with time’.

    Lisa Walters, meanwhile, remains a prisoner of the Union ...
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 21st September 2009 at 10:41 AM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  23. #943
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Synopsis of Book III: Rogue (Ch60-64 so far) up! New chaps comi

    ... And then????



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  24. #944
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Synopsis of Book III: Rogue (Ch60-64 so far) up! New chaps comi

    Quote Originally Posted by PancaKe View Post
    ... And then????
    And then Lisa awoke in a pool of Joseph Sterling's blood. Lance had revived Issechu, who killed Sterling with a beam of uttercrapness. Darius confessed his homosexual tendencies and attempted to consummate his unrequited love for Gavin, who unfortunately castrated him before fleeing the country. Marina watched from afar, updating her twitter feed with witty and occasionally self-referential observations of the entire affair. Lisa emerged from the melee physically unscathed but harboured a deep-seated resentment toward her newly out-of-the-closet crush, which eventually became a full-blown hatred of all things with a penis. She lives and breathes among us today under the name Germaine Greer.

    THE END








    ...

    ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRR, the author found himself mired in the busy final month of his university degree and needs a little more time.

    Patience, my dearest, beloved PancaKe. Patience.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  25. #945
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - Synopsis of Book III: Rogue (Ch60-64 so far) up! New chaps comi

    AUGH you had me so convinced until after the first sentence, The two things rushing through my mind were "OMG HE RUINED THE ENDING" and "OMG HE IS ONLY JOKING WHY AM I READING THIS"

    siiiigh. lol.

    Yay we both finish our degrees in the same year



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  26. #946
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo time!

    Hullo readers and general hangers-on!

    I thought I should keep you all in the loop, so I'll let you know that I've decided to participate in NaNoWriMo this year, using Lisa the Legend Book III as the novel that I'm writing.

    After NaNoWriMo is over, I'll begin posting new chapters right away, so the longest wait in LTL history is almost over.

    Feel free to cheer me on at random intervals, as I'll probably need the encouragement to push on!

    At the end of Day 2, I'm sitting on 8,126 words.

    Cheers!
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  27. #947
    Beginning Trainer
    Beginning Trainer
    Cadmus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    99

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 2: 8,126/50,000

    Go, Gavin, Go!

    [Cheer Mode: On]

  28. #948
    Elite Trainer
    Elite Trainer

    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    2,623

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 2: 8,126/50,000

    8,126? At this rate you'll be done by next week *hint hint*
    mistysakura
    2007 Golden Pens: Co-winner of Best Poem (Rain Eternal) and Best Reviewer
    2007 Silver Pencils: Winner of Best Poem (Death Sonnet -- Untitled)
    2004 Silver Pencils: Winner of Nicest Fanficcer & Least Likely Couple (with PancaKe)
    Former 3-time winner of Most Dedicated Reader at the Fanfiction Forums
    Also Keeper of the 'A'ctivator Unown

    Brimstone Diamonds. The Artist. Tightrope. Solitude. Autopsy.
    Glitter (one-shot).
    Listen to Rain Eternal -- a song.

    Random thought: 2+2=5.

  29. #949
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 2: 8,126/50,000

    Ahhh I was going to do that wtih full moon, but then decided I probably needed to entertain some other thoughts for a while. Good job Gav. 8,000 words is pretty neat. I'm only up to 2,000



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  30. #950
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 2: 8,126/50,000

    Merci beaucoup dude and dudettes. Thanks for fanning the flame of motivation/a better metaphor. ^_^

    Cadmus: I'm going, I'm going!

    Ada: I wish! I've got 2 oral exams and 3 written exams in the next week, so I'm rushing ahead of schedule now so that I don't fall too far behind in the next week. Nonetheless, setting a definite date of December 1 excites me. Wooooo.

    Tara: Full Moon can wait I guess. How's the new effort coming along?

    At the end of Day 3, I've got 10,304 words/50,000.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  31. #951
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 3: 10,304/50,000

    So, my final exams are finished, and my degree is completely done. (Assuming I pass everything.) I now have a lovely November spread out before me, waiting to be written all over. I have a bit of a catch-up to do with this, but I'm sure if I really apply myself I will be back on track in no time.

    [NaNoWriMo mode: Re-engage!]
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  32. #952
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 3: 10,304/50,000

    Have some catch up days, just as I am going to do. Not this week but next week I plan to have a Nanowrimo day or two with best friend. WE're going to knock out 25,000 words each time!



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  33. #953
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 3: 10,304/50,000

    Quote Originally Posted by PancaKe View Post
    Have some catch up days, just as I am going to do. Not this week but next week I plan to have a Nanowrimo day or two with best friend. WE're going to knock out 25,000 words each time!
    Each day?!?! Good Lord. I don't know if that can even physically be done, but good luck. I'm going to have a few dedicated days ahead, so I will post her and let you all know how I'm going with it.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  34. #954
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 17: 15,524/50,000

    I'm finally back NaNoWriMo-ing and making some good headway. I'm particularly glad that I rushed ahead at the beginning, or I'd feel something akin to utter despair right now.

    I know I can do this.

    At the end of Day 17 I'm sitting on 15,524 words.

    Thanks for your support and faith and blah blah blah guys! (I do mean it, despite the sarcastic blah blah blah.)

    Cheers!!!

    EDIT: 4000th POST! FINALLY. Couldn't have made it in a better place, either. ^_^ Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 17th November 2009 at 01:28 PM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  35. #955
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 22: 35,071/50,000

    So are you closer to finishing LtL? Want to share with us some secrets? DO GAVIN AND LISA GET TOGETHER?!



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  36. #956
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 22: 35,071/50,000

    XD

    Why on earth would you think that Lisa and Gavin would ever get together?

    I've come a long long way this year. Long long long. I've finally written things I've had planned for six or seven years. It feels good and I can't wait to share the future direction of the fic with you guys on the first of December. This stuff's been planned for so long so it feels amazing to have it actually exist on my page now.

    But I'm not finished. Not yet. You shall see. All shall become clear sooooon.

    And as if I could even think of giving away secrets! What questions could you possibly expect me to answer, anyway?

    Cheers!
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  37. #957
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 25: 40,824/50,000

    OH EMM GEE YOU ARE ONLY TEN THOUSAND WORDS AWAY OH THE EXCITEMENT

    edit.

    Congratulations. I am so proud. I can't believe after 50 000 words you are still not finished LTL. Amazing. When do we get to see? When do we get to experience what is the legend herself? When can we have lisa back in our lives?????


    And I'm not sure how i feel about Gavin and Lisa getting together. Not that I know if its a possibility or not yet. I just wonder, if they did get together, would it be a let down.... like, I want it to happen so badly that if it actually happened then what would I want nexT? You know? Ah sigh I'm brain vomiting again sorry all.
    Last edited by PancaKe; 1st December 2009 at 08:52 AM.



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  38. #958
    Super Moderator
    Super Moderator

    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Western Australia
    Posts
    5,741

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend - NaNoWriMo Day 30: 50,484/50,000!!! (I DID IT!)

    Cheers, guys, for all your support during my NaNoWriMo efforts! I am absolutely stoked that I managed to write more than 50,000 words of Lisa the Legend during November - and yes, I still have a way to go before this fic is finished. But, obviously, I have made enormous leaps and bounds ahead.

    Tara: Cheers. You'll have to keep reading and find out what happens in regards to Lisa and Gavin - if anything.

    Everyone: What can I say? It's been too long a wait. And yet, waiting enabled me to rediscover myself and this story and undertake writing it once more with a new sense of confidence and purpose and - yes - love.

    So I won't delay it any longer, except to say that today (1st December - give or take a few hours) marks the exact day in 2001 (eight years ago) that I posted chapter 1 of this story. So, as you read this chapter, please join me in wishing LTL its 8th birthday!!!

    And what better way to celebrate LTL's 8th birthday - and my successful completion of NaNoWriMo - than with a new chapter?

    Here's Chapter 65, at long last!

    Cheers!

    +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+


    Chapter 65 – Rogue.


    Lisa opened her eyes with a tremendous effort; it seemed her eyelids had become boulders overnight. She regarded her surroundings gingerly: the flat odour of dirt in her nostrils and the bite of the sharp stone digging into her stomach already lent themselves to unpleasant circumstances.

    Looking around, Lisa found her fears instantly confirmed. The surgical white corridors of Redwood Hospital were long gone; she was bound by three roughly-hewn walls of dull grey rock and a battery of parallel black steel bars placed about four inches apart from one another. Beyond the bars, there was what appeared to be a passageway leading away from the makeshift prison cell. A wooden torch reposed in a bracket fixed to the rock wall about two metres beyond the iron bars, throwing the underground tunnel into sharp relief with its medieval glow.

    For a long time, Lisa stared at the scene before her eyes, unable to move from where she lay, stomach down, on the dirt floor of her tiny cavern. The impossibility of it all. The incredulity that the iron bars that faced her gave dozens of her questions a single, horrible answer.

    The torch flickered slightly, as if troubled by a light wind; though where a breeze could be coming from Lisa could not fathom.

    The pain from the sharp rock beneath her stomach grew unbearable. Lugging her leaden left arm across the sand, Lisa pulled the stone out from under her and, with another gargantuan effort, tossed it in front of her; it hit against the nearest iron bar with a resounding clink.

    Abruptly, she burst into tears, shaking uncontrollably as she wept, her breath coming in ragged, worn-out gasps. The terror of her cavernous prison pressed like a solid weight against her throat. She cried, first, at the sheer fright: the total, deadened isolation, the darkness that no torch could illuminate; and the fear for herself quickly crumbled into despair, the utter despair of final, bitter defeat, that after six months of assiduous pursuit, the Union had won, and she had failed, and her parents had failed, and the Guard had failed, because now she was theirs, theirs for good, theirs bound in a cell; and eventually, the despair collapsed into a weariness too great for words, an exhausted state of knowing that the ordeal that had begun with the collapse of the Radio Tower all those months ago could not be solved by the presence of her parents, nor by a convalescent sojourn in a hospital … it was not over, it would not be over until Joseph Sterling got what he wanted … and now, he had it.

    The flame of the torch had grown small and was giving off uneven bursts of black smoke by the time Lisa eventually cried herself out. She wiped her eyes on the back of her hands, noting, in the slowly diminishing light, that she had been stripped of her watch. Without hope, she checked the pockets of her grubby jeans. No wallet. No pokéballs. No Buzzball. She did not need to feel beneath her black-and-orange jumper to know that her pokégear was gone, too, along with her backpack. She had no tools, no weapons. Nothing.

    She pulled herself gingerly into a semi-seated position, her legs curled beneath her. Her body, especially her joints, was still aching from the after effects of the Union’s Stunner attack, but it seemed they had not done anything further to harm her.

    Sighing at her own naiveté, Lisa began to trace her fingers over the wall nearest her in search of a hole or a nook – any means of potential escape – but before she had run her hand over more than a few feet of seamless grey rock, the torch gave off a laboured puff of black smoke and died, throwing her into absolute darkness.

    *

    Though she tried, Lisa found it impossible to keep her mind off what had happened at Redwood Hospital; or rather, what might have happened. All she had were guesses and theories, and more often than not, fears. The points she found herself dwelling on most were whether her parents had escaped from the Union or not; and what on earth had become of Gavin. Had he got the other patients away from the hospital in time? Or had he teleported back, searching for Lisa, only to be attacked by the Union agents?

    She also went through phases of feeling intense pangs of terror for her pokémon. Had the Union simply removed them from her to leave her powerless, or were they up to something more awful, like the experiments Lenina had conducted in Port Valeo?

    As the time pressed on arbitrarily, Lisa found herself developing an odd game of tapping her fingers against each of the thick iron bars in turn, first counting all twenty-one of them, then trying to see if they made any different sound to one another when she tapped them. It seemed like the fourteenth and fifteenth bars from the left had a more tinny sound than the others, but after feeling around in the dark, Lisa discovered this was due to the latch affixed between them. She then spent what felt like a decent hour attacking the latch with an array of small rocks and, desperately, her fingernails; after which, unsuccessful, she spent a few tired minutes calling out for someone to help her before she began to play a mirthless game of sticking her arms through the gaps in the bars, imagining that escape would be possible if she really tried to flatten herself out, but she always got stuck at the shoulder.

    After she gave up on the hopeless escape attempts, Lisa rolled onto her back, staring up at the invisible rock ceiling, and found her mind drifting back to the time before the life she now lived. Before the Guard, before the Union, before the Legend and the Keys, before the deaths and the near-misses, before the kidnappings and the mysteries … before Gavin and Marina and Darius … before the day she left the house to train Aipom at the Burned Tower.

    She remembered the last time she had seen her friends Tuscany and Charmaine, in her backyard on a warm day in early October last year – when the very idea of being captured by a criminal organisation and left in a dark cell would have been ridiculous.

    *

    2002, October

    “Travel!” cried Charmaine, her bushy hair bouncing against her back as she came to a stop.

    “No way, I only took one step!” Lisa shouted back, her eyes on the basketball she had just jettisoned into the air. It bounced squarely off the backboard and, barely grazing the ring, tumbled gracefully through the net with a clean swish.

    “Bull!” Charmaine contested loudly, catching the ball as it bounced. “Tusc, come on, call it!”

    Sitting cross-legged on the outdoor picnic table, Tuscany put her hand to her chin in a display of mock pensiveness, stroking an imaginary beard.

    “It’s a difficult call,” she said at length. “On one hand, it did appear that Lisa ‘Steps’ Walters may have been up to her old tricks and taken a total of no fewer than three steps across the court. However, dearest Charmaine, it is also true that when I asked you what you thought of my new haircut this afternoon, you said I looked like a boy. Thus, as a fair and balanced ref, I have to pay the goal to Lisa Walters, which means she wins the game!”

    “YES!” roared Lisa, thrusting both her fists into the air in triumph and holding her hand out to the flushed Charmaine, who simply scowled and, thrusting the ball in Tuscany’s direction, added, “But you do look like a boy! Come on, who in their right mind cuts their hair that short?”

    Lisa laughed, jogging to the picnic table to pour herself a victory glass of lemonade. Tuscany, after catching the orange basketball and placing it between her knees, ran a hand over her new dark brown bob.

    “It’s not even that short,” she snarled at Charmaine, who was in the process of fighting her unwieldy mane into a tighter ponytail. “I just didn’t want to have a big head of hair while I’m cruising around the Orange Islands – it would be way too hot.”

    Lisa gulped down three icy mouthfuls of lemonade and wiped the sweat off her brow. The sun was high in the sky; it was almost noon.

    “I can’t believe it’s tomorrow that you’re leaving,” she said wistfully. “How come you’re not more excited?”

    Tuscany seemed to become stiff for a moment, but she quickly shook it off, uncrossing her legs and sliding from the table top to the seat beside Lisa.

    “I am excited,” she said, after a pause. “It’s just that … it’s also a bit scary, you know. Leaving my parents, leaving Ecruteak. And I know I’ve only known you girls a while, but I’m gonna miss you both like hell.”

    “Oh yes, we’ll miss you and your unbiased refereeing, too,” sniped Charmaine, screwing up her freckled face at Tuscany, who appeared unperturbed.

    “Well, I really will miss you,” Lisa added seriously, setting her glass on the table and surveying her two closest friends. “Both of you. You have no idea how jealous I am that you get to go off on your own journeys. I mean, Tusc, you get the whole tropical cruise thing – and Charm – the Indigo League? You’ll be gone for months.”

    Charmaine plunged her hand savagely into a packet of barbeque chips and sighed.

    “I still think you should fight your parents on this, Lisa,” she said firmly. “So what if they don’t want you to travel? You’re fourteen years old, for God’s sake! We’re done with school. There are kids younger than you hiking from city to city as we speak, earning badges and all the rest, and yet you’re going to be stuck here playing basketball with your purple monkey thing all summer. It’s not fair. Your folks are way too overprotective. Seriously, you should just fight ‘em. You’re a teenager; they expect you to argue with them anyway!”

    Lisa shook her head seriously. “My folks aren’t like yours, Charm. I can’t think how mad they’d be if I actually did argue with them. It’s just not something I’d really do, you know?”

    Charmaine clicked her tongue in frustration.

    “So what are you going to do then? You’ve got all summer to think about – and what about next year? Are you going to work? Or go on to upper secondary?”

    Lisa shrugged. “I could do more Humanities studies, I spose. Maybe English or History, or Languages. My grades were good enough. Otherwise I suppose I’ll get a job somewhere … I dunno where … I haven’t really talked about it that much with my parents yet …”

    Charmaine rolled her eyes impatiently and crunched through four chips at once; Tuscany, meanwhile, looked genuinely thoughtful.

    “What I don’t get,” she said, “is why your folks bothered to send you Aipom if they’d already banned you from travelling or starting out on any kind of journey. I mean, it just seems kind of like rubbing salt into the wound, doesn’t it?”

    Lisa bristled at the assertion that her parents were acting with any form of malice.

    “I suppose they just wanted me to have a pokémon as a friend,” she said dismissively, taking a long sip of fizzy lemonade. “And it’s not as if we do nothing at all. I mean, we have gone to the park around the corner and battled a few Rattata and stuff. That was pretty exciting.”

    Tuscany looked at Lisa sadly. “Yeah, but will it stay exciting all summer, Leese?”

    *

    Lisa emerged from her happy reverie with a jolt: a loud grinding noise had just reverberated throughout the tunnel. She froze with fear, listening intently for any indication of where the noise had come from. After a few airless moments, she heard the unmistakeable approach of footsteps.

    A melange of feelings swirled in the pit of her stomach. She was afraid of the Union, and yet anything, any event, any contact with another human being was welcome after such a long time in the desolate cavern.

    The footsteps grew rapidly louder – there were two sets of them – and, after about a minute, Lisa saw, at the far end of the tunnel, a distant speck of light: an electric torch.

    She wanted to call out to the people approaching her, but she did not know whether to welcome them or scream at them to go away. Apprehensive silence won the debate in her mind. She watched, small, as the speck of light grew larger and larger, eventually sweeping over the rocks nearest her and, finally, coming to rest directly upon her.

    Blinded by the beam of light, Lisa closed her eyes as the echoes of the pairs of boots on the cavern floor stopped, clearly very close to her.

    “Come with us,” said a deep, deadened male voice.

    Lisa heard a set of keys clatter against the lock in the iron gate between her and the Union agents. There was a dull grating sound, and then a high-pitched shriek as the gate was flung open.

    Only when she felt the pairs of hands on her did she react: a tsunami of fury awoke within her; abruptly, she was screaming, shouting fierce epithets and blunt swear words that she had never used before – that she had never even known she had the capacity or brashness to use. She did her best to struggle, swinging her arms through the air at her captor, but being blinded by the torchlight left her at a disadvantage.

    “Enough. Enough!” roared the Union agent who was trying to pull her into a standing position; Lisa felt a stern grip take hold of her right wrist, then felt a cold metal handcuff clapped over it, digging slightly into her flesh.

    “NO. NOOOOOO!” she screamed, in what she hoped was the direction of the agent’s ear. “I HATE YOU. I – FUCKING – HATE YOU!”

    The agent beside her seemed amused at her temerity. “Got a mouth on her, this one, ay?” he chuckled to his fellow agent. Lisa heard another handcuff slide into place but, feeling nothing on her left wrist, she realised that she had been cuffed to the agent’s side.

    “Walk,” commanded the agent beside her, forcibly dragging her alongside him. “You can swear as much as you want, but you should know it’s not very becoming of a nice young girl like yourself.”

    The other agent chuckled.

    Lisa tried to plant her feet firmly on the soil, but resistance was impossible; the agent only had to take a step before she was forcibly jolted along with him. If this, along with his voice, was anything to go by, he was a man of imposing stature and strength.

    After they had taken a few unwieldy steps forward, the torchlight shifted direction, finally giving Lisa a chance to see her captors. She blinked rapidly, trying to clear her vision of the radiant stain left by the torch; a few moments passed before she was able to make out an enormous male figure by her side, his jaw enormous and stubbled, and a more normal-sized blond man a couple of metres away from her, the electric torch between his thighs as he struggled to extract the key from the lock of Lisa’s erstwhile cell.

    She did not recognize either of them.

    Eventually, the agent recovered the key and held the torch out before them all, revealing a long, haphazardly-hewn tunnel ahead.

    “Walk,” said the agent beside Lisa again.

    She tried again, in earnest, to stay put, but the agent’s bulk simply dragged her sneakers through the dirt and forced her to oblige. After a long and difficult couple of minutes, and amid the mocking laughs of both agents, Lisa resigned herself to walk with them willingly, half-heartedly convincing herself that wherever they were taking her, she would be better off than in her dark and gloomy cell.

    The grey floor of the tunnel wove onward for quite some time, curving left and right and gently sloping upward as time wore on. Lisa imagined that she could hear disembodied echoes rebounding from somewhere else, but she could not be sure that it was more than her own fearful imagination. The tunnel eventually led to a damaged-looking wooden door, which the Union agents led her through before proceeding straight through an intersection of three tunnels, which were now lit by torches fixed in brackets on the walls.

    After about ten minutes, as they passed one such torch, Lisa found her eyes drawn to a speck of light on the wall beside the flame. It seemed that the grey rock of the wall was twinkling slightly … it was almost silver …

    “In here,” snarled the agent cuffed to her side.

    He pulled her through a door which led into what looked like a makeshift office. Though it was, essentially, a cramped, underground cavern, there was a large bookshelf positioned against the far wall, with a cheap wooden desk before it and an olive-green filing cabinet in the corner. A topographical chart covered most of the desk space, a royal blue pin sticking out of it.

    The silver hue in the rock walls was unmistakeable in here.

    “Sit down,” rumbled Lisa’s Siamese twin, pulling a straight-backed chair from behind the desk. Before Lisa could decide whether to comply or not, he reached his muscled right arm over to her shoulders and pushed her down into the chair.

    The smaller agent strode in after them, switching off his torch (there was an electric lamp on the desk) and setting it down on the filing cabinet. He grinned smugly at Lisa before looking up at his partner with bemusement.

    “What is it?”

    The muscled agent had his right hand in his pocket, and was fishing around with an expression of growing dismay.

    “The key,” he grunted. “The key to the cuffs. I can’t find it. Must’ve dropped it down in the cell.”

    The ruddy face of the smaller agent showed clear frustration.

    “You can’t do anything right these days, can ya, Larry?”

    By way of response, the bigger agent flexed his tattooed right bicep in the direction of his mate. The smaller agent visibly paled.

    “Go back and get the key,” grunted Larry, his voice deep and masculine.

    “But why can’t y-” began the other agent.

    Larry brandished his left wrist in the air impatiently; the silver handcuff and Lisa’s right arm rose into the air along with it.

    “Don’t forget who you’re talking to,” he snarled. “Get the key,” he said again. It wasn’t a question.

    The other agent grabbed his torch from the filing cabinet and, scowling, left the room, the wooden door clunking shut behind him.

    The moment his footsteps faded away, Larry thrust his meaty hand into his right pocket again and produced a small, sleek, silver key.

    “We have ten minutes, max,” he said abruptly.

    Lisa gaped at the gigantic agent beside her. His dark, beady eyes were earnest and his jaw had softened into a kind of semi-smile.

    “What?” she said, dumbfounded.

    He held the key to the lock on the handcuffs.

    “We have ten minutes,” he repeated seriously, “to find a way to get you the hell out of here.”
    Last edited by Gavin Luper; 1st December 2009 at 01:56 PM.
    ...Quest for the Truth of the Legend ...

    Lisa the Legend

    Winner of 12 Silver Pencil Awards 2011 - Including Best Plot, Best Character in a Leading Role, Best Moment and Best Fic of the Forum for Lisa the Legend!

    Quote Originally Posted by mr_pikachu
    Feel free to withdraw at any time, Gavin.

    Quote Originally Posted by DragoKnight View Post
    ...Far too many references!! You're like the Swiss army knife of discussion.

  39. #959
    i ♥ f a n f i c f o r u m Master Trainer
    Master Trainer
    PancaKe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    south west sydney <3
    Posts
    7,274

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend: Chapter 65 - Rogue.

    So I guess I expected a long epic chapter. This chapter was epic, but not so much on the long side. I felt it was a bit too one sided; as in, I would've liked to hear from Gavin or the Guard, but at the same time, Lisa's lonliness was emphasized by the lack of news on anyone else. So I guess I have mixed feelings.

    It reminded me of The Third Day, The Frost - where Ellie and Homer and all the guys get dragged into prison. I thought the prison could have been elaborated on more, and i guess at the end it felt like, oh and now conveniently she is going to escape. I actually thought at first that she would be raped, which would be a more conceivable twist than oh and another double agent....

    So I guess although I was so thrilled and my heart pounded so much to read this, I felt like it ended too soon. Within the first three paragraphs my heart was pounding, I was feeling things I felt when I read John Marsden, and then it was just over.

    Cliffhanger, good, but still ... over.

    Mixed feelings. On the one hand, so happy there is more LTL. On the other, I guess you could tell that this was your first few thousand words for nanowrimo and all first few thousand words are like this. I'm rewriting LVH, and ooft, the first few thousand words are terrible. (actually I realise now, most of it is terrible hahaha) but I guess all we'll see from here in is IMPROVEMENT! YAY

    and Gavin.

    Yay.

    I love you Gavin



    ♥ Funeral for a Friend . Opeth . Faith No More . Dream Theater ♥
    Unown ! Award (2008) for Amazing Comback!
    Unown S Award (2009) for Smile
    2009 Silver Pencils:
    Best Poem (All I Can Say About You) | Best Plot Twist (Full Moon) | Best Contributor | Queen of Fanfic | TPM Addict



    Quote Originally Posted by shazza View Post
    Mt. Moon gives me that similar feeling I used to get when I would wake up first thing in the morning as an 11/12 year old and get excited about browsing TPM.

  40. #960
    The slaughter never ends. Junior Trainer
    Junior Trainer

    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    344

    Default Re: Lisa the Legend: Chapter 65 - Rogue.

    Fwee, always good to see more of this. ^^

    First of all, I rather liked the flashback, mostly, I think, due to the nice contrast between it, a lighthearted and funny scene, and the generally darker tone of the rest of the chapter.

    And Larry succeeded in surprising me. That was a nice little twist there, I thought, especially since I thought it made for a nice note on which to end the chapter--not only a surprise but a glimmer of hope there. (Side note: I think I might have exhausted my allotted uses of the word "nice" for a little while. X3)

    Other highlights and et cetera:

    As the time pressed on arbitrarily, Lisa found herself developing an odd game of tapping her fingers against each of the thick iron bars in turn, first counting all twenty-one of them, then trying to see if they made any different sound to one another when she tapped them. It seemed like the fourteenth and fifteenth bars from the left had a more tinny sound than the others, but after feeling around in the dark, Lisa discovered this was due to the latch affixed between them. She then spent what felt like a decent hour attacking the latch with an array of small rocks and, desperately, her fingernails; after which, unsuccessful, she spent a few tired minutes calling out for someone to help her before she began to play a mirthless game of sticking her arms through the gaps in the bars, imagining that escape would be possible if she really tried to flatten herself out, but she always got stuck at the shoulder.
    I liked this bit. I thought those were some really interesting little thought processes on her part that we got to see there. Plus that's some nice attention to detail there, what with the bars that sounded different and why they sounded different.

    “It’s a difficult call,” she said at length. “On one hand, it did appear that Lisa ‘Steps’ Walters may have been up to her old tricks and taken a total of no fewer than three steps across the court. However, dearest Charmaine, it is also true that when I asked you what you thought of my new haircut this afternoon, you said I looked like a boy. Thus, as a fair and balanced ref, I have to pay the goal to Lisa Walters, which means she wins the game!”
    XD That's certainly an interesting refereeing method she's got there...

    “It’s just that … it’s also a bit scary, you know. Leaving my parents, leaving Ecruteak. And I know I’ve only known you girls a while, but I’m gonna miss you both like hell.”

    “Oh yes, we’ll miss you and your unbiased refereeing, too,” sniped Charmaine, screwing up her freckled face at Tuscany, who appeared unperturbed.
    *giggle-snort* X3

    Charmaine plunged her hand savagely into a packet of barbeque chips and sighed.
    Heh, I rather like the use of the word "savagely" there.

    Also, you made me crave barbecue chips. DAMN YOUUUUUUU! X3

    Charmaine rolled her eyes impatiently and crunched through four chips at once
    Thus causing the "Betcha can't eat just one" slogan to pop into my head. X3

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •